Quotes and Sayings about Word & Excel

Quotes and Sayings about Word & Excel

One of my colleagues keeps typing numbers into her calculator and transfers them into an Excel sheet. I'm crying.

Optimist: The glass is 1/2 full.
Pessimist: The glass is 1/2 empty.
Excel: The glass is January 2nd.

"What do you think about Excel?"
"I hate it."
"Okay, experienced user, then."

"My word is full of little boxes!"
"That is Excel, boss."

Me: "Dear Word, I left some space on page 7 to fill it with an image now."
Word: "Seriously?! Here, I broke your document's format and put the image on page 21. Have fun!"

The secret to a beautiful and well structured Excel sheet is me never having touched it.

Me: "Excel - never again! There's nothing worse."
PowerPoint: "Hello there!"

One of my colleagues asked me to briefly explain Excel to her. I started laughing histerically while setting her computer on fire.

I just wanted to move a picture in Word to the left by one inch... suddenly, my text is gone, the picture's rotated, four new pages appear, the tectonic plates start shifting and earth leaves its orbit.

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Computers may out-think us one day, but as long as people got feelings we'll be better than they are.

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It was one thing to use computers as a tool, quite another to let them do your thinking for you.

Tom Clancy in The Hunt for Red October

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Computers make excellent and efficient servants, but I have no wish to serve under them.

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Supercomputers will achieve one human brain capacity by 2010, and personal computers will do so by about 2020.

Ray Kurzweil

Droids are not good or bad. They are neutral reflections of those who imprint them.

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One of the most feared expressions in modern times is "The computer is down."

Norman Ralph Augustine

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window.

Steve Wozniak

I had a TV set and a typewriter and that made me think a computer should be laid out like a typewriter with a video screen.

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The rise of Google, the rise of Facebook, the rise of Apple, I think are proof that there is a place for computer science as something that solves problems that people face every day.

Eric Schmidt

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Computers are like Old Testament gods; lots of rules and no mercy.

Joseph Campbell

Before you marry a person you should make them use a computer with slow internet, to see who they really are.

Will Ferrell

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Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe trying to build bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning.

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Microsoft has had clear competitors in the past. It's a good thing we have museums to document that.

Bill Gates - am 1. Oktober 2004 (Rede im Museum für Computergeschichte)

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My working life happened to have been EXACTLY 'the magic years' when computers went from nowhere to somewhere.

Ken Williams (Husband of Roberta Williams) - 07/2003

Where's the "any key"? Hm... I think I order a "tab".

Homer Simpson in The Simpsons

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Microsoft is in a very unique position to be able to go spend Sony out of business. Sony is really the only other player who could compete with Game Pass and we have a 2 year and 10 million subs lead.

Matt Booty - June 2023

Microsoft is in a lot of the same businesses that Google is in.

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Because it's everybody's business.

(Microsoft)

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Hi, my name is Bill Gates and I'll teach you how to count to ten:
1.0, 2.0, 3.0, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10

Bill Gates Microsoft Windows

How could this Y2K be a problem in a country where we have Intel and Microsoft?

1

John D. Rockefeller wanted to dominate oil, but Microsoft wants it all, you name it: cable, media, banking, car dealerships.

Ralph Nader

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You can make something big when young that will carry you through life. Look at all the big startups like Microsoft, Apple, Google, Facebook, Twitter, etc. They were all started by very young people who stumbled on something of unseen value. You'll know it when you hit a home run.

Steve Wozniak

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Facebook is in a very different place than Apple, Google, Amazon, Samsung, and Microsoft. We are trying to build a community.

Mark Zuckerberg

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We've truly reimagined windows.

Steve Ballmer (Microsoft CEO) - 25.10.2012, about Windows 8

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Linux is a cancer that attaches itself in an intellectual property sense to everything it touches.

Steve Ballmer (Microsoft CEO) - 2001

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