Quotes by Will Rogers

Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.

When the Oakies left Oklahoma and moved to California, it raised the I.Q. of both states.

All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance.

Buy land. They ain't making any more of the stuff.

Worrying is like paying on a debt that may never come due.

Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.

Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.

Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.

A man only learns in two ways: one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.

Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.

Invest in inflation. It is the only thing going up.

Hawaii is the only place I know where they lay flowers on you while you are alive.

Make crime pay. Become a lawyer.