Quotes and Sayings about Whiskey

Every time you kiss me, it's like sunshine and whiskey.

Look, for the last time: We have nothing to protect but our honor. So you can take your cheap horse piss that you call "whiskey" which, by the way, is spelled without an "e" and is nothing compared to a Single Malt Scotch and you can go fk yourself.

They say God invented whiskey to stop the Irish from rulin' the world.

Too much of anything is bad, but too much good whiskey is barely enough.

I wish to live to 150 years old, but the day I die, I wish it to be with a cigarette in one hand and a glass of whiskey in the other.

Happiness is having a rare steak, a bottle of whisky, and a dog to eat the rare steak.

Freedom and whisky gang thegither!

So much I like to drink Scotch that sometimes I think my name is Igor Stra-whiskey.

One good thing about rain in Scotland. Most of it ends up as scotch.

What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for.

Lenny Feder: "Doctor, wouldn't it be nice if there was a cure for anger?"
Dr. Larry: "There is. It's called Jack Daniels."

I got some scotch. Aged eighteen years. The way I like it.

Mel: "Any chance of getting a cosmo?"
Jack: "Nope. Not unless you brought your own Cointreau."
Mel: "I did not. So, mixed drinks are not...-"
Jack: "Not our thing. But I have all the boys: Johnnie, Jack, and Jim."

Whisky's good proofing water. Tells you who's real and who isn't.

Whisky to a Scotsman is as innocent as milk to the rest of the human race.

Whiskey is liquid sunshine.

Stop your nonsense and drink your whiskey!

Bean: "Wow, that's the best soup I ever had!"
Dagmar: "It's Whiskey."

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake.

I like singing and I like drinking Scotch. Most people prefer hearing me while drinking Scotch.

I should never have switched from Scotch to martinis.

To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems!

Everything's better with some wine in the belly.

Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction.

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

'That's the problem with drinking', I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen.

The damage has been done. All that's left to do now is drink until the part of the brain that creates mental pictures is dead.

Alcohol is for people who can afford to lose a few brain-cells.

It is not true that drink changes a man's character. It may reveal it more clearly.

A kiss is something you need both hands for.

If you're a homeless, alcoholic Scott and you had tourettes... how would they ever know?

Just know that having something to lose is what makes life worth living.

Merlin: You know, lad, that love business is a powerful thing."
Arthur: "Greater than gravity?"
Merlin: "Well, yes, boy. In its way, I'd say it's the greatest force on earth."

If you find yourself in a hole the first thing to do is stop digging.

Here's to good Irish friends - never above you, never below you, always beside you!

It is St. Patrick's Day and here in Scranton, that is a huge deal. It is the closest that the Irish will ever get to Christmas.

I was born with good health and a strong body and spent years abusing them.

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.

Suspense is worse than disappointment.

What gives the artist real prestige is his imitators.

He used to be fairly indecisive, but now he's not so certain.

Bean: "K-O-B-R-Q-V-Y. Confidence."
Eric: "Well, we're not gonna have to pay for college."

We'll just tell your mother that... we ate it all.

I believe there is nothing more righteous than defending those who can't defend themselves.

May: "May Carleton. I breed racehorses and train them. What is it you do?"
Thommy: "I rarely answer questions is what I do."

Grace: "I had the phone put in. It's in the back."
Tommy: "If we knew someone else who had a phone, we could call them."

Ross: "I could ask her to live with me. I mean, why not?"
Chandler: "Because you've only known her for six weeks. I've got a carton of milk in my refrigerator I've had a longer relationship with."

You see things; and you say 'Why?"
But I dream things that never were; and I say 'Why not?"