The best Quotes by Vernon Dursley

"Fought 'em off, did you, son?" said Uncle Vernon loudly, with the appearance of a man struggling to bring the conversation back on to a plane he understood. "Gave 'em the old one-two, did you?"
"You can't give a Dementor the old one-two," said Harry through clenched teeth.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Dudley Dursley

Harry Potter: "What if I accidentally let something slip?"
Uncle Vernon: "You'll get the stuffing knocked out of you, won't you?"

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

I will not pay to have some crackpot old fool teach him magic tricks!

Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

What have I told you about saying the "M"-word in our house?

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

Uncle Vernon: "Fine day, Sunday. In my opinion, best day of the week. Why is that, Dudley?"
Harry: "Because there's no post on Sundays?"
Uncle Vernon: "Right you are, Harry! No post on Sundays. No blasted letters today! No, sir! Not one single bloody letter!"

Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

Why we ever kept you in the first place, I don't know, Marge was right, it should have been the orphanage. We were too damn soft for our own good, thought we could squash it out of you, thought we could turn you normal, but you’ve been rotten from the beginning and I've had enough.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

When will they learn, that hanging's the only way to deal with these people?

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

I'm warning you, I'm warning you now, boy - any funny business, anything at all - and you'll be in that cupboard from now until Christmas.

Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

"Record numbers of stranded holidaymakers fill airports as the Spanish baggage-handlers' strike reaches its second week -"
"Give 'em a lifelong siesta, I would," snarled Uncle Vernon over the end of the newsreader's sentence.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Owls treating the place like a rest home, puddings exploding, half the lounge destroyed, Dudley's tail, Marge bobbing around on the ceiling and that flying Ford Anglia - OUT! OUT! You've had it! You're history!

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Vernon: "Hang on. This Lord Voldything's back, you say."
Harry: "Yes."
Vernon: "The one who murdered your parents."
Harry: "Yes."
Vernon: "And now he's sending Dismembers after you?"
Harry: "Looks like it."
Vernon: "I see."

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

There's no such thing as magic!

Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

Quotes about Vernon Dursley

Lupin: "Harry, I've left a letter telling your aunt and uncle not to worry."
Harry: "They won't."
Lupin: "That you're safe."
Harry: "That'll just depress them."
Lupin: "And you'll see them next summer."
Harry: "Do I have to?"

Harry James Potter in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Petunia Dursley

"I've already got a house, my godfather left me one. So why would I want this one? All the happy memories?"
There was silence. Harry thought he had rather impressed his uncle with this argument.

Harry James Potter in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

Vernon: "He'll not be going!"
Hagrid: "If he wants ter go, a great Muggle like you won't stop him."

Rubeus Hagrid in Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

"Make no mistake, we'll hear about it," added Lupin pleasantly.
"Yes," said Mr Weasley, "even if you won't let Harry use the fellytone."

Arthur Weasley in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

I expect what you're not aware of would fill several books, Dursley.

Alastor "Mad-Eye" Moody in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

"Are you threatening me, sir?" he said, so loudly that passersby actually turned to stare.
"Yes, I am," said Mad-Eye, who seemed rather pleased that Uncle Vernon had grasped this fact so quickly.
"And do I look like the kind of man who can be intimidated?" barked Uncle Vernon.
"Well..." said Moody, pushing back his bowler hat to reveal his sinisterly revolving magical eye. Uncle Vernon leapt backward in horror and collided painfully with a luggage trolley. "Yes, I'd have to say you do, Dursley."

Alastor "Mad-Eye" Moody in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

It's addressed to me, Vernon, look! Mrs Petunia Dursley, The Kitchen, Number Four, Privet Drive.

Petunia Dursley in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

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You're the weak one. And you'll never know love, or friendship. And I feel sorry for you.

Harry James Potter in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Voldemort / Tom Riddle

We've all got both light and dark inside of us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are.

Sirius Black in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Morality

Ron: "One person couldn't feel all that. They'd explode."
Hermione: "Just because you've got the emotional range of a teaspoon doesn't mean we all have!"

Hermione Granger in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Ron Weasley

Anything is possible if you got enough nerve.

Ginny Weasley in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Courage Motivation

"E" for "Exceeds Expectations". And I've always thought Fred and I should've got "E" in everything, because we exceeded expectations just by turning up for the exams.

Fred and George Weasley in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Being different isn't a bad thing. It means you're brave enough to be yourself.

Luna Lovegood in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Character Self-Confidence

By all means continue destroying my possessions, I daresay I have too many.

Albus Dumbledore in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

It does not do to dwell on dreams, Harry, and forget to live.

Albus Dumbledore in Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

Dreaming

There is no good and evil, there is only power and those too weak to seek it.

Voldemort / Tom Riddle in Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

Power Good & Evil

After all, to the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure.

Albus Dumbledore in Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

Spirit Death

The truth is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with great caution.

Albus Dumbledore in Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

Truth

It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to our enemies, but just as much to stand up to our friends.

Albus Dumbledore in Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

Courage

Apparently wizards poke their noses in everywhere!

Petunia Dursley in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

You didn't just lose a mother that night in Godric's Hollow, you know. I lost a sister.

Petunia Dursley in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

Lily Potter

Vernon: "Anyway, it's not as if there'd be anything about his lot on our news -"
Petunia: "Vernon, shh! The window's open!"

Petunia Dursley in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

He's a boisterous little boy, but he would hurt a fly!

Petunia Dursley in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

Dudley Dursley

"They think I'm a waste of space, actually, but I'm used to -"
"I don't think you're a waste of space."
If Harry had not seen Dudley's lips move, he might not have believed it.

Dudley Dursley in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

Dudley, meanwhile, was counting his presents. His face fell. "Thirty-six," he said, looking up at his mother and father. "That's two less than last year."

Dudley Dursley in Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

Harry: "Five against one, very brave."
Dudley: "Well, you're one to talk. Moaning in your sleep every night. At least, I'm not afraid of my pillow."

Dudley Dursley in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Albus Severus, you were named after two headmasters of Hogwarts. One of them was Slytherin and he was probably the bravest man I ever knew.

Harry James Potter in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

Severus Snape Albus Dumbledore Albus Severus Potter Slytherin

I don’t go looking for trouble. Trouble usually finds me.

Harry James Potter in Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.

Albus Dumbledore in Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

Courage Light

Don't put your wand there, boy! What if it ignited? Better wizards than you have lost buttocks, you know!

Alastor "Mad-Eye" Moody in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.

Albus Dumbledore in Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

Character Decisions

Dumbledore watched her fly away, and as her silvery glow faded he turned back to Snape, and his eyes were full of tears. "After all this time?"
"Always", said Snape.

Severus Snape in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

Never be ashamed, there's some who'll hold it against you, but they're not worth botherin' with.

Rubeus Hagrid in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain!

Arthur Weasley in Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

Brain

...yet, sadly, accidental rudeness occurs alarmingly often. Best to say nothing at all, my dear man.

Albus Dumbledore in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

Kindness

The best Quotes by Vernon Dursley

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