Quotes and Sayings about Vaginas

Frank: "Why you gotta be such an asshole?"
Lip: "Apple fell where you dropped it."

V: "You always pick p*ssies!"
Fiona: "Well, they are what they eat."

Everyone is shaving their p*ssy. And hipsters these days have beards. So society has the same amount of hair, just on different c*nts.

Play with my p*ssy, but don't play with my emotions

"What are you up to these days? Got a girlfriend?"
Ezra: "No."
"You don't like getting p*ssy?"
Ezra: "Well, hearing the word 'p*ssy' come out of your mouth does make me question whether or not I like it."

Here's to p*ssy and gunpoweder
Live by one, die by the other, love the smell of both

Emily: "Why is it le vagin and not la vagin?"
Sylvie: "Oh, you mean le vagin. I don't know. It just is. Maybe it's because it's something a woman owns and a man possesses."

I wanted to begin chatting to whoever the chess guy was... oh, it's you? What's your favorite opening? I bet it's not a v*gina.

Nadine: "Lucy, do you think you want to try getting out of bed today?"
Amanda: "We're getting smell complaints from the city. Have you just been masturbating and braiding your hair for three weeks?"
Lucy: "My vibrator will never break my heart."
Amanda: "Well, it will break your v*gina."

Hop on top, I wanna ride
I do a kegel while it's inside
Spit in my mouth, look in my eyes
This p*ssy is wet, come take a dive

In my naivety I always assumed that women would somehow be better than men. But I guess arseholes will always be arseholes, it doesn't really matter if they have a penis or a v*gina.

Mr. Brown: "Mr. Brown? That's little too close to Mr. Shit."
Mr. Pink: "Yeah, Mr. Pink sounds like Mr. P*ssy."

Scum on these b*tches, I slime on these b*tches
Want panorama, David Banner
Pull up, she wetter than water
Watermelon p*ssy, eat it wit' no manners, splat

I ain't a killer, but don't push me
Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin' p*ssy

Larry Bloom: "Piper, you put a pee stick in my rinsing cup."
Piper Chapman: "Well, you put your pee stick in my v*gina. And that's why we're in this situation."

She's gotta start working on tightening her p*ssy muscles, 'cause her fiance's dick is so small, it's like a hot dog in a hallway.

Manager: "So you think you got what it takes?"
Ted: "I'll tell you what I got - your wife's p*ssy on my breath!"
Manager: "Nobody's ever talked to me like that before."
Ted: "That's because everyone's mouth is usual full of your wife's box."
Manager: "You're hired."
Ted: "Shit..."

Max: "I kissed Johnny."
Caroline: "What? When?"
Max: "He came by the apartment right after you left."
Caroline: "I was only gone 20 minutes. What'd you do - shine a bat symbol on your v*gina?"

Samantha: "If I had a son, I'd teach him all about the v*gina."
Carrie: "If you had a son, we'd call social services."

I'm telling you that no amount of top-shelf p*ssy can compete with the love of a good woman.

Is your v*gina listed in the New York City guide books? Because it should be - hottest spot in town. Always open.

I'm known for snatching purses and bombing churches
I get more p*ssy on accident then most n*ggas get on purpose

You should never trust a woman who just had her heart broken. We tend to lie.

When a woman quits on a man, she either got enough of him or she didn't get enough from him.

A jealous female can be tricked into everything.

The most beautiful clothes that can dress a woman are the arms of the man she loves. But for those who haven't had the fortune of finding this happiness, I am there.

A woman can be gorgeous at 19, charmimg at 29, but only at 39 she is irresistible for the rest of her life. And no woman that has been irresistible, ever turns older than 39.

If you want more sex, just ask for it.

Sheldon: "You do understand that our efforts here will in no way increase the odds of having sexual congress with this woman?"
Leonard: "Men do things for women without expecting sex."
Sheldon: "Those would be men who just had sex."

Don't do drugs, don't have unprotected sex, don't be violent... leave that to me.

Caus' you see, for me, sex is a sport, like racquetball. Play hard for half an hour, work up a sweat and hope you don't get hit in the eye.

You can't ruin a friendship with sex. That's like trying to ruin ice cream with chocolate sprinkles

I love you. It means we take care of each other. It means thick and thin, good times, bad, sickness, health, all that shit.

You're a beautiful, sweet girl. F*ck this guy!

Did I ever really love Big or was I addicted to the pain? The exquisite pain of wanting someone so unattainable.

Debs, we need at least one person in this family to not turn cynical, and my money's been on you.

Seriosly, I don't mean to be an asshole, it's just... genetic.

I'm gonna talk about racism now. And this is a straight white man talking, so pay attention!

Han Lee: "Max, why did you kick out the hipsters?"
Max: "Cause I could not be in the background of another Instagram photo!"

I love you, I wanna big chill
Boy, don't trip, I'll split a big bill
Take you 'round the world, they don't have to understand
Rub it in their face, put a rock on her hand

Akbar: "This kufi that I'm wearing was actually a gift from the honorable Louis Farrakhan. Are you familiar with the minister's work?"
Ezra's Mom: "Well, I'm familiar with what he said about the Jews..."
Ezra: "Let's have dinner!"

Here's to the nights that turned into mornings,
and the friends that turned into family!

Sylvie: "You'll let your sex life determine business decisions?"
Emily: "We never had Sex!"
Sylvie: "Well, maybe, you should. You're so tense."

You go to Saint-Tropez to party, not to work. It's like going to Ibiza to do your taxes.

You think the attachments to cafe toilet keys are big? Interesting, interesting.
I think they're normal sized.

You know how the game of chess is played. Pieces must be sacrificed!

Heartbreak is the loneliest feeling in the world. And the truth is it happens to us all.

I said my face bomb, ass tight
Racks stack up Shaq height
Jewelry on me, flashlight
I been lit since last night

Joseph: "So, what do you think?"
Lisa: "Mhm, it looks like a desktop background."

Moritz: "You shouldn't hit people with disabilities!"
Buba: "You mean him or you?"