That's it. Three rules. I call 'em the 'Don't be stupid'-rules. 'Cause we're not stupid, alright?0
Science is neat, but I’m afraid it’s not very forgiving.Science0
Don’t take it so personally, okay? I don’t like most people. He’s in the vast majority.0
Monica: 'Chandler and I have this pact not to have sex again until the wedding.'
Ross: 'A 'no sex'-pact, huh? I actually have one of those going on with every woman in America.'
Bean: 'I'm gonna have to kill him or something.'
Luci: 'Do it! Do it! Do it! And after you kill him we can hide the body. Then we could join the search party and you and I can look at each other and try not to laugh.'
Your cruddy life is worth living, Bean. And so is mine... if you live.0
Chandler: 'Oh my God, those are my bedroom eyes? Why did you ever sleep with me?'
Monica: 'Do you really want to pull at that thread?'
Chandler: 'Wait a minute, is she going for spring vacation or is she going for spring break?'
Ross: 'What's the difference?'
Monica: 'Well, a spring vacation you're doing nice things with your grandparents. Spring break you're doing frat guys.'
Destiny is baloney. Your future is not foretold. It's what you make of it.0
Bean: 'What's this weird feeling I don't want to drink away?'
Elfo: 'That's hope. That's hope!'
Luci: 'You know what we say in hell? 'Hope's for dopes.''
Bean: 'You two sleep down at my feet. I call it the friend zone.'
Luci: 'Get comfortable. You ain't never getting outta here.'
Hey, he's making fun of my dreams. That's what friends do.0
I'd rather die a big death than live a small life.Life0
I wanna taste something other than sweetness. I wanna cry salty tears, learn bitter truths. I wanna take a big, meaty bite out of life and dip it in mustard.0
All this wedding hassle for a stupid political alliance? I thought that I'd get married for true love, or because I was wasted.0
'How long does ist take for you to pick a Yale three-pin?'
'Well, then in eight minutes, you're gonna make four grand. Ten minutes if you decide to pick your nose.'
Trade. The basic system of barter exchange that you have to do really carefully or you'll end up with Dwight Howard.0
I got us Thai iced teas, unless you want me to pour you something less non-alcoholic.0
Ross: 'I could ask her to live with me. I mean, why not?'
Chandler: 'Because you've only known her for six weeks. I've got a carton of milk in my refrigerator I've had a longer relationship with.'
Ross: 'She's got to go back to London. But, you know what? I've been prepared for this from the start. We both knew we had two weeks together and then that's it.'
Joey: 'That's what all my relationships are like.'
Chandler: 'Yes, but in Ross' case, they both know in two weeks that's it.'
Alice Knight: 'We were just at the drugstore, so we got you a little present.'
Frank Buffay: 'It's a lollipop and a home pregnancy test.'
Monica: 'Don't mix those up, you could really ruin that lollipop.'
Love lasts forever, you know? Nothing like it in this lifetime. Money in the bank.Love0
Joey: 'Can you close that window, Chandler? My nipples could cut glass over here.'
Phoebe: 'Wait, really? 'Cause mine get me out of tickets.'
Joey: 'You're smoking again?'
Chandler: 'Well, actually, yesterday I was smoking again. Today, I'm smoking still.'
Joey: 'I had the same dream.'
Phoebe: 'Yeah, and nobody slept with that Xerox girl.'
Joey: 'Oh, I had the opposite dream.'
Phoebe: 'For your information, this happens to be a pain like no man will ever experience.'
Chandler: 'I don't think you can make that statement, unless you've been kicked in the area, God only meant to be treated nicely.'
Joey: 'It's never taken me more than a week to get over a relationship.'
Monica: 'It's never taken you more than a shower to get over a relationship.'
Nice try. You see, the Netherlands is this make-believe place where Peter Pan and Tinkerbell come from.0
[..] to an infamous story about a pubic hair in a coke can. Which is the most disgusting thing you could possibly discover in a coke can - other than Pepsi.Cola0
Danger's my middle name. Well, actually it's Quincy, but you guys get the picture.0
Time to count our Christmas cards. One... now, let's read it!0
I can't help it, Laura. I'm drawn to you. Like a moth to a flame. A bee to a blossom. A mouse to cheese.0
Eddie: 'Urkel, why don't you ever knock?'
Steve Urkel: 'Well, if I did, nobody would ever let me in.'
Laura: 'Steve Urkel, you are the most annoying human being that I have ever met!'
Steve Urkel: 'You heard her, you're all witnesses. She actually said, 'Human Being'. She's mine!'
Edo, cheating is like wearing your grandmother's underpants. Sure, it may cover your hiney, but if you make a habit of it, you've got a serious problem.0
Laura: 'How long have we known each other?'
Steve Urkel: 'Nine years, three months, two weeks, four days, six hours, eight minutes, and fourteen seconds... fifteen seconds... sixteen seconds.'
Joey: 'Monica, relax. Go get a beer.'
Monica: 'I don't want a beer.'
Joey: 'Who said it was for you?'
Joey: 'Some girl ate Monica.'
Monica: 'Shut up, the camera adds ten pounds!'
Chandler: 'So how many cameras are actually on you?'
Phoebe: 'It's not mine, I didn't earn it. If i kept it, it would be like stealing.'
Rachel: 'Yeah, but if you spent it, it would be like shopping.'
I love you, Stefan. Hold on to that. Never let that go.0
In all the world, violent men are the easiest to deal with.0
Whisky’s good proofing water. Tells you who’s real and who isn’t.Alcohol0
Grace Burgess: 'You think I am a whore?'
Tommy Shelby: 'Everyone's a whore, Grace. We just sell different parts of ourselves.'
Senior citizens, the people who stay active by playing shuffleboard, going on walks or performing their hit-song 'I can't get no satisfaction' in front of packed arenas around the world.0
Generally, Balls are to the human body what 'Starz' is to a cable package: It comes with it, we understand that, but it's not nice to look at and nobody really knows what to do with it.0
it is a gift to convince oneself of something and then to believe it with all one's heart0
I think sometimes we aren't keeping secrets to hide from other people. I think sometimes we're keeping them to protect those people.Secrets0