The best Series Quotes (Page 154)

Mr. Peterman: "Elaine, can you keep a secret?"
Elaine: "No sir, I can't."

George: "You're gonna over-dry your laundry."
Jerry: "You can't over-dry."
George: "Why not?"
Jerry: "Same reason you can't over-wet."

George: "You've got to apologize."
Jerry: "Why?"
George: "Because it's the mature and adult thing to do."
Jerry: "How does that affect me?"

I’m not a lesbian. I hate men, but I’m not a lesbian.

That’s the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me.

I have a bad feeling that whenever a lesbian looks at me they think 'That’s why I’m not a heterosexual.'

Peter: "Well, I got the results of your ultrasound and I got some news for ya."
Pregnant Woman: "Wait, wait, wait, we don't wanna if it's a boy or a girl."
Peter: "Oh, okay. Well, IT's not breathing."

It's not a crime to love what you cannot explain.

We all bear scars, mine just happen to be more visible than most.

The worst day of loving someone, is the day that you lose them.

True love will triumph in the end - which may or may not be a lie, but if it is a lie, then it's the most beautiful lie we have...

There is no such thing as bad ideas. Just poorly executed awesome ideas.

Because in the end, when you lose somebody, every candle, every prayer is not going to make up for the fact that the only thing you have left is a hole in your life where that somebody that you cared about used to be.

When you lose someone, it stays with you. Always reminding you of how easy it is to get hurt.

I believe that when you love someone and that person loves you in return, you're uniquely vulnerable. They have a power to hurt you like nothing else.

Don't underestimate the allure of darkness. Even the poorest hearts are drawn to it.

Lydia: "Are you okay? I guess you are, aren't you? For someone who would put their own name on a hit-list..."
Meredith: "I had to."
Lydia: "Why?"
Meredith: "Because I heard you-- I heard you scream in the tunnels at Oak Creek. That's why I knew it was the right time... to start over."
Lydia: "But with Peter?"
Meredith: "He's the Alpha. He's always been the Alpha. He'll make it right. It never was for us-- so many people die because of us. We're the monsters. Even Banshees. Even me."
Lydia: "I don't believe that. Not all monsters do monstrous things."
Meredith: "Like who?"
Lydia: "Like Scott"
Meredith: "Like you"

Not all Monsters do monstrous things!

Marty: "Thanks for going to outer space, so no matter what I do, my mum will be disappointed in me."
Howard: "Well, I married a little catholic girl, so we're even."

Sheldon: "Why do people cry at weddings?"
Mary: "They're practicing for what's coming later."

Let experience wash over you, absorb it like a sponge. Expect nothing, only then can you be prepared for anything.

Rory: "Dean, wait!"
Dean: "Why?"
Rory: "Because... because I love you, you idiot!"

I love you, Elena. And it's because I love you that I can't be selfish with you.

When the time comes she needs to tell my sons who I really am. I’m not a good man. I’m a criminal and a killer. I need my sons to grow up hating the thought of me.

You can’t drink him away. It won’t work.

Sometimes when people love each other very much, they need time apart, so when they come back together, their love is even stronger.

You did okay, Mickey. You know, you tried. That’s a lot more than most people would do.

I love you. It means we take care of each other. It means thick and thin, good times, bad, sickness, health, all that shit.

I believe the answer to that question, like the answer to most questions, is f*ck you!

You need to let me go… You need to let me let you go.

Sometimes we get so wrapped up in getting what we want, that we forget to ask ourselves why we wanted it in the first place.

Love is not supposed to be cute. Love is supposed to be raw and destructive.

I can’t tell you that this is definitely gonna work out. There’s no guarantees. But if this turns out to be a big mistake, then let’s make it the most fun big f*cking mistake we’ve ever made.

I just need someone to say, "F*ck it. This kid deserves a chance."

Crushes may fade, but JPEGs are forever.

Mr Garrison: "What is 5x2? Come on, children. Don't be shy, just give it your best shot. Yes, Clyde?"
Clyde: "12?"
Mr Garrison: "Okay, now let's try to get an answer from someone who's not a complete retard."

Betray Me, and i‘ll chase you into hell.

I know that new situations can be intimidating. You look around, and it's all scary and different. But meeting them head-on, charging right into them like a bull, that's how we grow as people.

You're both young, you're both unsure about your place in the universe, and you both want to be Grandpa's favorite. I can fix this. Morty, sit here. Summer, you sit here. Now, listen - I know the two of you are very different from each other in a lot of ways, but you have to understand that as far as Grandpa's concerned, you're both pieces of sh-! Yeah, I can prove it mathematically. Actually, l-l-let me grab my whiteboard. This has been a long time coming, anyways.

Weddings are basically funerals with cake.

Nobody exists on purpose. Nobody belongs anywhere. We're all going to die. Come watch TV?

Morty: "Rick, can we not leave without my sister?"
Rick: "Ugh. You have infinite sisters, Morty. Not that I want to spend the rest of my day looking for another one. Sum-Sum, let's go! Grandpa's concern for your safety is fleeting."

Jessica: "I miss you."
Morty: "You miss the old me. You miss someone that loved you so much, you never had to love him back."

Rick: "If it's all the same, could we still get our stories straight? Because you're a terrible liar."
Jerry: "You called me a master convincer!"
Rick: "You believed me?"

So you're half cold, unfeeling reptile, half also cold, equally unfeeling machine? Wow, so your origin is what? You fell into a vat of redundancy?

Bill: "As Sean just destroys ist. Holy shit, dude! I still had to diagram it."
Sean: "Dude, just keep high APM, that's it."

George: "As soon as I graduate High-School, I'm gonna be a professional male-model."
Meemaw: "That is hilarious."
George: "What? I'm good looking."
Meemaw: "No, that you think you'll graduate High-School."

What if Einstein's parents had held him back? We wouldn't even have the... - I was gonna say "atomic bomb", but there's probably a better example.

Sean: "Did the fox just eat a skunk? What happened?"
Bill: "That was a glitch, running around on the ground and then one of the debuggers got it."

I drank when I was pregnant with you, you turned out fine. There's everybody saying 'don't drink, don't smoke'. I swear - Texas is turning into California.