Funny sayings for sitting on the Toilet

I'm tired of running to the gas station to use the bathroom. The guy makes me buy a Gatorade every time - it's a vicious circle.

The government just decided: Every houshold hoarding more than 10 rolls of toilet paper is from now on regarded as a public toilet.

Jim: "Yesterday, we had a meeting about planets."
Michael: "Jim, to be fair, the conversation wasn't about planets. We were talking about introducing a line of toilet paper. And what part of the human body does one use toilet paper upon?"

Did you come up with toilet buddy? It's a circular net you put inside the toilet to catch all of your change and your wallet from falling into the toilet.

One of his jinxes backfired, the toilet exploded and they found him lying unconscious in the wreckage covered from head to foot in -

Harry: "A Regurgitating Toilet?"
Arthur: "Anti-Muggle pranksters. Muggles are pulling the flush and instead of everything disappearing - well, you can imagine. The poor things keep calling in those - those pumbles, I think they're called - you know, the ones who mend pipes and things."

Kiara: "They're gonna have Japanese toilets with towel warmers."
JJ: "Of course. Why wouldn't they?"
Kiara: "This used to be a turtle habitat, but who cares about the turtles, I guess?"
JJ: "I can't have cold towels."