Quotes by Tim Allen

Timothy Alan Dick, known professionally as Tim Allen, is an American actor and comedian. He is known for playing Tim "The Toolman" Taylor on the ABC sitcom Home Improvement and Mike Baxter on the ABC sitcom Last Man Standing.

The best Quotes and Sayings

My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.

Tim Allen
 
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You don't know what people are really like until they're under a lot of stress.

Tim Allen
 
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In my experience, it's all wonderful with girls until about 16. Around that time, boys kind of calm down and start focusing their testosterone. Girls get a little challenging, especially for fathers.

Tim Allen
 
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Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn't go far didn't see him shoot across that floor. I told him he was grounded.

Tim Allen
 
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Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.

Tim Allen
 
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