Quotes from The Office (Page 3)

Here you can find the best Quotes from The Office, an American series that is set in the office of the fictional paper company Dunder Mifflin.

The best Series Quotes

Toby is in HR, which technically means he works for corporate. So he's really not a part of our family. Also he's divorced, so he's really not a part of his family.

Michael Scott in The Office, Season 2 Episode 2
 
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Please do not drink and drive... because you may hit a bump and spill the drink.

Michael Scott in The Office, Season 2 Episode 1
 
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I mean, who's gonna give Kevin an award, Dunkin' Donuts?

DonutsMichael Scott in The Office, Season 2 Episode 1
 
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I live by one rule: "No office romances". No way! Very messy, inappropriate. But I live by another rule: "Just do it" - Nike.

Michael Scott in The Office, Season 1 Episode 6
 
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The purse girl hits everything on my checklist. Creamy skin, straight teeth, curly hair, amazing breasts... not for me, for my children - the Schrutes produce very thirsty babies.

Dwight Schrute in The Office, Season 1 Episode 6
 
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Michael: "This is our warehouse, or, as I like to call it, the 'whoorehouse'. But don't you call it that. I've earned the right."
Ryan: "Fine. Don't worry about that."

Ryan Howard in The Office, Season 1 Episode 5
 
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This is so sad. This is the smallest amount of power I've ever seen go to someone's head.

Jim Halpert in The Office, Season 1 Episode 5
 
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One thing about deer, they have very good vision. One thing about me, I'm better at hiding than they are... at vision.

Dwight Schrute in The Office, Season 1 Episode 4
 
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Everything Dwight does annoys me. And I spend hours thinking of ways to get back at him, but only in ways that would get me arrested.

Jim Halpert in The Office, Season 1 Episode 4
 
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I suggested we flip a coin, but Angela said she doesn't like to gamble. Of course, by saying that, she was gambling that I wouldn't smack her.

Pam Beesly in The Office, Season 1 Episode 4
 
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The main difference between me and Donald Trump is that I get no pleasure out of saying the words, "You're fired."

Donald TrumpMichael Scott in The Office, Season 1 Episode 4
 
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All right. Who did this? I'm not mad, I just want to know who did it, so I can punish them.

Dwight Schrute in The Office, Season 1 Episode 3
 
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Schrute: "Never been sick. Perfect immune system."
Jim: "Well, if you've never been sick, then you don't have any antibodies."
Schrute: "I don't need them. Superior genes. I'm a Schrute."

Dwight Schrute in The Office, Season 1 Episode 3
 
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I don't believe in coddling people. In the wild, there is no healthcare. In the wild, healthcare is: Ow, I hurt my leg. I can't run. A lion eats me. And I'm dead.
Well, I'm not dead. I'm the lion. You're dead.

Dwight Schrute in The Office, Season 1 Episode 3
 
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Jim: "Last night on 'Trading Spouses', there's...- have you seen it?"
Pam: "No, I have a life."
Jim: "Interesting. What's that like?"

Jim Halpert in The Office, Season 1 Episode 3
 
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You'll notice I didn't have anybody be Arab. I thought that would be too explosive. No pun intended.

Michael Scott in The Office, Season 1 Episode 2
 
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How come Chris Rock can do a routine, and everyone finds it hilarious and groundbreaking. Then I go and do the exact same routine, same comedic timing, and people file a complaint to corporate?

Michael Scott in The Office, Season 1 Episode 2
 
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I'm a friend first and a boss second. Probably entertainer third.

Michael Scott in The Office, Season 1 Episode 1
 
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This is from corporate. How many times have I told you that there's a special filing cabinet for things from corporate? It's called the wastepaper basket!

Michael Scott in The Office, Season 1 Episode 1
 
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If I left, what would I do with all this useless information in my head? You know? Tonnage price of manila folders?

Jim Halpert in The Office, Season 1 Episode 1
 
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He put my stuff in Jell-O again! That's real professional. Thanks. This is the third time, and it wasn't funny the first two times either, Jim!

Dwight Schrute in The Office, Season 1 Episode 1
 
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Heros of mine would be... Bob Hope. Abraham Lincoln, definitely. Bono. And probably God would be the fourth one. I just think all those people really helped the world in so many ways that it's really beyond words.

Michael Scott in The Office, Season 1 Episode 1
 
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I don't think it would be the worst thing if they let me go. Because then I might...- I just, I don't think it's many little girls' dream to be a receptionist.

Pam Beesly in The Office, Season 1 Episode 1
 
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I love the American Southwest, for starters. You may call them Arizona, New Mexico, Nevada, Utah. I call them heaven.

Nevada, Arizona, New Mexico, UtahDeangelo Vickers in The Office, Season 7 Episode 20
 
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