Thanksgiving is almost here and as soon as people realize how much money they have to spend on holiday gifts, their wallets snap tighter than Kim Kardashian's legs after the wedding check cleared.Max Black in 2 Broke Girls, Season 1 Episode 10
Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough.Gratitude, SatisfactionOprah Winfrey
I like football. I find its an exciting strategic game. Its a great way to avoid conversation with your family at Thanksgiving.American FootballCraig Ferguson
There's always something to be thankful for on Thanksgiving. Even if it's just not being a turkey.Unknown
May your stuffing be tasty
May your turkey plump
May your potatoes and gravy have nary a lump
May your yams be delicious and your pies take the prize
And may your Thanksgiving dinner stay off your thighs!
I celebrated Thanksgiving the old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.Jon Stewart
They should change the name of Thanksgiving to something more fitting, like say, Turkeypocalypse.Unknown
Thanksgiving, man. Not a good day to be my pants.Kevin James
The thing I'm most thankful for right now is my elastic waistband.Unknown
You can't have a good Thanksgiving meal without a little bit of ketchup on the side.Patrick Mahomes
An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.Unknown
I absolutely adore Thanksgiving. It's the only holiday I insist on making myself.Ina Garten
Thanksgiving Day is a good day to recommit our energies to giving thanks and just giving.Amy Grant
People really don't have to give you anything, so appreciate what people give you.Gratitude, Quotes to think aboutAretha Franklin
What do Black Friday shoppers and Thanksgiving Turkeys have in common?
Both know how it feels to be stuffed and cramped in narrow spaces.