The best Quotes by Steve Urkel

Laura: "Steve Urkel, you are the most annoying human being that I have ever met!"
Steve Urkel: "You heard her, you're all witnesses. She actually said, 'Human Being'. She's mine!"

Family Matters

Edo, cheating is like wearing your grandmother's underpants. Sure, it may cover your hiney, but if you make a habit of it, you've got a serious problem.

Family Matters

Laura: "How long have we known each other?"
Steve Urkel: "Nine years, three months, two weeks, four days, six hours, eight minutes, and fourteen seconds... fifteen seconds... sixteen seconds."

Family Matters

I know I'm not worthy of you. But I just can't help loving you. It's like wanting to touch a star - you know you'll never reach it, but you just gotta keep trying.

Family Matters - Season 2 Episode 3

Desire Breakup Love declerations

Laura: Forget it, Steve, I don't even have time to be mean!"
Steve Urkel: "Great, maybe I'll stay a while."

Family Matters - Season 1 Episode 14

Laura: "Hide-and-seek, that's it."
Steve Urkel: "Oh, great, my parents play this with me all the time. Once, I found them in Milwaukee living under an assumed name."

Family Matters - Season 1 Episode 14

Estelle Winslow: "Steve, how did you get so good at checkers?"
Steve Urkel: "Practice. Fortunately, when I was young I had no friends."

Family Matters

Laura: "Where did you get the money for this?"
Steve Urkel: "From my stay-away fund. Every year, my relatives send me money in hopes that I won't visit them."

Family Matters

Clarence: "Yo, you a serious little nerd."
Steve Urkel: "No, I AM a serious little nerd. You see, I use verbs. Verbs are our friends. They help move along our sentences."

Family Matters

Grammar

Well, look at his poor, pathetic face. He's so sad he could depress Richard Simmons.

Family Matters

Richard Simmons

Laura: "Thank you, Steve. Now, I'm gonna give you a compliment. But, it's only a compliment and it doesn't mean anything more than that."
Steve Urkel: "Oh, I understand."
Laura: "You did good."
Steve Urkel: "You love me, don't you?"

Family Matters

Sorry I'm late, but I got my tongue stuck in the printing press.

Family Matters

Chicago, lock up your daughters! Mt. Urkel is about to erupt.

Family Matters

Daughters One-Liners

Steve Urkel: "I've taken a vow of chastity."
Carl: "Steve, you've always been chaste."
Steve Urkel: "Yeah, but now I have an excuse."

Family Matters

I've got an Uncle Dirk Urkel who was blessed with a two-foot long nose hair. Well, he got it trapped in the rear door of a Buick and was dragged eight and a half blocks.

Family Matters

My uncle, Elijah Urkel, has been struck by lightning four times. At a party, once, he clamped cables to his earlobes and jump-started a Volkswagen. Then there's in the summer, when we use him as a human bug zapper. He's usually knee deep in dead mosquitoes. And then there was the time we went camping and we were in dyer need of a generator and we just plugged the toaster into Uncle Elijah and the Pop Tarts were flying.

Family Matters

Carl: "Steve, will you please stop sulking and come out of the bathroom?"
Steve Urkel: "You yelled at me and you called me a butthead."
Carl: "Of all the names that I have called you , the one that bothers you is butthead?"
Steve Urkel: "Yes. It was my nickname in preschool."

Family Matters

Quotes about Steve Urkel

So that's it? A couple of white Urkels offer you sausages and you're gone?

Robin Scherbatsky in How I Met Your Mother - Season 6 Episode 16

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Edward: "I still got a chance, it's between me and two other guys. They're better with the hose, but I'm the smartest."
Laura: "And they find their way to work every morning?"

Laura Winslow in Family Matters - Season 1 Episode 15

Carl, you don't cook, you burn. You burn eggs, you burn toast, you're the only man I know who burns Jell-O.

Harriette Winslow in Family Matters - Season 1 Episode 14

Edward: "That's it. I've had it with that dog."
Harriette: "What happened?"
Edward: "Look what he did to my algebra homework!"
Harriette: "Tell your teacher your dog ate it."
Edward: "I can't, I used that excuse before we got the dog."

Edward Winslow in Family Matters - Season 1 Episode 13

Steve Urkel: "Hi Laura, my little sweet potata! Did you think of me while you guys were camping?"
Laura Winslow: "Yeah, every time I used the bug spray."

Laura Winslow in Family Matters

Lt. Murtaugh: "They're sending in that Urkel kid."
Carl Winslow: "What? We've got cheerleaders taller than him."

Carl Winslow in Family Matters

Judy Winslow: "Mom, when's dinner? We're starved."
Harriette: "Soon, baby. Your dad's runnin' late."
Laura: "Let's eat everything and see if he can take a joke!"

Laura Winslow in Family Matters

No tricks, gimmicks, special pills, special potions, special equipment. All it takes is desire and will.

Richard Simmons

Motivation

Well, maybe this isn't a breakup. Maybe this is two friends getting back together.

Robin Scherbatsky in How I Met Your Mother - Season 5 Episode 7

Friendship Relationships

It's only once you've stopped, that you realize how hard it is to start again. So you force yourself not to want it.

Ted Mosby in How I Met Your Mother - Season 6 Episode 3

Breakup Beginning

It's like you're homesick for a place that doesn't even exist.

Garden State

Desire Breakup Home

The world will break your heart ten ways to Sunday. That's guaranteed.

Pat in Silver Linings

Life Breakup

I would rather share one lifetime with you than face all the ages of this world alone. I choose a mortal life.

Arwen in The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring - to Aragorn

Love declerations

Eleanor: "Is 'do revenge' even, like, correct grammar?"
Drea: "Oh, I'm sorry, Schoolhouse Rock, are you dragging my sentence structure right now?"

Drea Torres in Do Revenge

Grammar

Dear Boys, be the type of guy you want your daughter to be with.

Daughters Father & Daughter

Life's just a game and lucky you, you're playing it with me.

Alter in Apex Legends

One-Liners

The best Quotes by Steve Urkel

Quotes about Steve Urkel

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