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The best Quotes by Steve Smith
Series-Quotes
I’m gonna go hit the sack, and then probably go to bed.
American Dad!
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Guns don't kill people, people kill people! Guns defend people against people with smaller guns.
Stan Smith
in
American Dad!
- Season 1 Episode 14
1
Weapons
NRA
There's an old German saying: 'Don't blame the fish!' There are other sayings, but they mostly involve genocide...
Klaus Heisler
in
American Dad!
Gummi Bears?! He replaced my bullets with Gummi Bears from the mini bar... that's gonna cost me $7!
Stan Smith
in
American Dad!
- Season 10 Episode 11
Oh, I love your religion... for the crazy! Virgin birth. Water into wine. It's like Harry Potter, but it causes genocide and bad folk music.
Roger the Alien
in
American Dad!
- Season 5 Episode 9
Christianity
Quotes about Harry Potter
A real New York hotel! How many Wall Street bankers have had their first prostitute here?
Francine Smith
in
American Dad!
- Season 10 Episode 14
Stan, we can't have a grown woman acting like a child in our house. This ain't no Disney Channel.
Francine Smith
in
American Dad!
- Season 11 Episode 3
Roger
: "I once survived four days in a Del Taco parking lot extracting life-saving nutrients from puddles and bird shit."
Steve
: "Why didn't you just go into the Del Taco?"
Roger
: "I'm a Taco Bell man."
Stan Smith
in
American Dad!
- Season 11 Episode 15
Doctors are stupid, Roger. They're just failed dentists.
Stan Smith
in
American Dad!
When I joined the CIA, I knew the deal. If we make a mistake, we cover it up. Like the time Dick accidentally created feline AIDS and we covered it up by blaming it on gay cats.
Stan Smith
in
American Dad!
- Season 11 Episode 20
Hello, Bill Gates? Turns out I’m the richest guy in the world, because I have an adoring wife and a loving family.
Hello, UNICEF? Yes, I’d like to donate some of my immense riches. What’s that? Children are still starving in Africa because wife love is worthless to you? What an odd policy!
Stan Smith
in
American Dad!
1
Bill Gates
I guess I just picked a whole bouquet of oopsie-daisies.
Stan Smith
in
American Dad!
Ah, saturday afternoon TV. Where the sneaky networks hide all the good shows.
Stan Smith
in
American Dad!
Television
Boil water? What, am I a chemist?
Stan Smith
in
American Dad!
- Season 1 Episode 18
In a hundred years, when there’s a million jerks riding around Manhattan drunk in limos, the west will seem like a paradise.
Roger the Alien
in
American Dad!
- Season 12 Episode 22
The new Pixar movie, Clothes. It’s about the secret lives of clothes. John Ratzenberger plays a tie.
Stan Smith
in
American Dad!
If you start deporting every shady looking guy with questionable tattoos, who's gonna go to Jets games?
Jordan Klepper
in
The Daily Show
New York Jets
One downside of our big brains is we're the only creatures who are aware that death is inevitable. Although, if you lined ten dogs in a row and shot them one by one, the dog on the end would probably get the gist by about dog four.
Philomena Cunk
in
Cunk On Life
- Episode 1
Brain
Related pages to Steve Smith
American Dad!
Stan Smith
Roger the Alien
Francine Smith
Klaus Heisler
Series-Quotes
American Dad!
Stan Smith