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The best Quotes by Stan Smith
Series-Quotes
Guns don't kill people, people kill people! Guns defend people against people with smaller guns.
American Dad!
- Season 1 Episode 14
1
Weapons
NRA
Gummi Bears?! He replaced my bullets with Gummi Bears from the mini bar... that's gonna cost me $7!
American Dad!
- Season 10 Episode 11
Roger
: "I once survived four days in a Del Taco parking lot extracting life-saving nutrients from puddles and bird shit."
Steve
: "Why didn't you just go into the Del Taco?"
Roger
: "I'm a Taco Bell man."
American Dad!
- Season 11 Episode 15
Doctors are stupid, Roger. They're just failed dentists.
American Dad!
When I joined the CIA, I knew the deal. If we make a mistake, we cover it up. Like the time Dick accidentally created feline AIDS and we covered it up by blaming it on gay cats.
American Dad!
- Season 11 Episode 20
Hello, Bill Gates? Turns out I’m the richest guy in the world, because I have an adoring wife and a loving family.
Hello, UNICEF? Yes, I’d like to donate some of my immense riches. What’s that? Children are still starving in Africa because wife love is worthless to you? What an odd policy!
American Dad!
1
Bill Gates
I guess I just picked a whole bouquet of oopsie-daisies.
American Dad!
Ah, saturday afternoon TV. Where the sneaky networks hide all the good shows.
American Dad!
Television
Boil water? What, am I a chemist?
American Dad!
- Season 1 Episode 18
The new Pixar movie, Clothes. It’s about the secret lives of clothes. John Ratzenberger plays a tie.
American Dad!
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There's an old German saying: 'Don't blame the fish!' There are other sayings, but they mostly involve genocide...
Klaus Heisler
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Oh, I love your religion... for the crazy! Virgin birth. Water into wine. It's like Harry Potter, but it causes genocide and bad folk music.
Roger the Alien
in
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- Season 5 Episode 9
Christianity
Quotes about Harry Potter
A real New York hotel! How many Wall Street bankers have had their first prostitute here?
Francine Smith
in
American Dad!
- Season 10 Episode 14
Stan, we can't have a grown woman acting like a child in our house. This ain't no Disney Channel.
Francine Smith
in
American Dad!
- Season 11 Episode 3
I’m gonna go hit the sack, and then probably go to bed.
Steve Smith
in
American Dad!
In a hundred years, when there’s a million jerks riding around Manhattan drunk in limos, the west will seem like a paradise.
Roger the Alien
in
American Dad!
- Season 12 Episode 22
Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces people into thinking they can't lose.
Bill Gates
2
Success
Capitalism has worked very well. Anyone who wants to move to North Korea is welcome.
Bill Gates
1
Capitalism
North Korea
Your most unhappy customers are your greatest source of learning.
Bill Gates
- 1999
1
Business
Life is not fair, get used to it!
Bill Gates
1
Life
Fairness
Mankind invented the atomic bomb, but no mouse would ever construct a mousetrap.
Albert Einstein
18
Humanity
Weapons
Nuclear Weapons
I feel like I've got feet firmly in different camps. Between the right of gun ownership and public safety.
Tim Walz
NRA
Television is a medium of entertainment which permits millions of people to listen to the same joke at the same time, and yet remain lonesome.
T. S. Eliot
6
Media
Television
If you start deporting every shady looking guy with questionable tattoos, who's gonna go to Jets games?
Jordan Klepper
in
The Daily Show
New York Jets
Related pages to Stan Smith
American Dad!
Bill Gates
Weapons
NRA
Television
Roger the Alien
Francine Smith
Steve Smith
Klaus Heisler
Series-Quotes
American Dad!
Bill Gates
Weapons
Roger the Alien