The best Quotes from Shameless

I love you. It means we take care of each other. It means thick and thin, good times, bad, sickness, health, all that shit.

Mickey Milkovich - Season 5 Episode 12

Love declerations

You can’t drink him away. It won’t work.

Debbie Gallagher - Season 5 Episode 8

Alcohol Breakup

I believe the answer to that question, like the answer to most questions, is fuck you!

Phillip Gallagher - Season 2 Episode 8

Love is not supposed to be cute. Love is supposed to be raw and destructive.

Frank Gallagher - Season 7 Episode 10

Love

Jenna dances for an audience. You dance like there's no one else in the room. You life's not simple, Fiona, and you can't stop it from showing because you're no fake. You're not lost. You don't need finding. This whole city belongs to the Jennas, I'm sick of them. I swear, Fiona, you're nothing like anyone I've ever met. You make me want to enjoy my life again.

Jimmy Lishman - Season 1 Episode 1

Fiona Gallagher Love declerations

If God didn't want us putting things up our ass, he would have given the rectum a gag reflex.

Frank Gallagher - Season 3 Episode 4

Ass

Every time we open our hearts, every time we open our gates, we take a risk.

Sarah Cleary - Season 6

Sometimes when people love each other very much, they need time apart, so when they come back together, their love is even stronger.

Sheila Jackson - Season 2

You did okay, Mickey. You know, you tried. That’s a lot more than most people would do.

Phillip Gallagher - Season 5 Episode 6

Lip: "Hey, whoa. You really think they deserve your hard-earned money for that service?"
Frank: "Dine and dash?"
Lip: "Bite and bolt."
Frank: "Eat it and beat it?"

Season 3 Episode 12

Restaurants

What can I say, once you go white, you always stay tight. Hey, I think I just insulted myself.

Kevin Ball - Season 3 Episode 12

Frank: "What did they get you for again?"
"Beat my ex-wife to death with a telephone."
Frank': "Cordless or landline?"

Frank Gallagher - Season 3 Episode 12

Been sleeping in this car six years. Pissed, puked, jizzed in it. By law of bodily fluids, it's mine.

Season 3 Episode 11

I have red hair, freckles and crooked teeth. I don't need any more character!

Debbie Gallagher - Season 3 Episode 10

Ginger / Redhairs

Debs, we need at least one person in this family to not turn cynical, and my money's been on you.

Phillip Gallagher - Season 3 Episode 10

Debbie Gallagher

I don't go onto Facebook because I don't give a shit about whose pet just died or who just checked in at the fucking McDonald's.

Phillip Gallagher - Season 3 Episode 9

Facebook

I'm sorry, but no one speaking English as a first language should be doing this job.

Jimmy Lishman - Season 3 Episode 8

Seriosly, I don't mean to be an asshole, it's just... genetic.

Fiona Gallagher - Season 3 Episode 6

I kind of have no choice. I gotta find Frank. Get him sober and ready to appear in court. He's like my sad-ass Obi-Wan Kenobi.

Fiona Gallagher - Season 3 Episode 6

Frank Gallagher Obi-Wan Kenobi

Lanier: "Your body is a temple, Carl, and you only want to put things in it that are natural."
Carl: "Like fists? I saw it in that movie."

Carl Gallagher - Season 3 Episode 6

You're like a fucking cockroach, able to live anywhere and feed off anything.

Ian Gallagher - Season 3 Episode 6

Phillip Gallagher

Kate: "Fishing? Gonna use your tiny dick as a worm?"
Frank: "I've caught some big whales with this little worm. Yourself included there, Moby."

Frank Gallagher - Season 3 Episode 6

You get along a lot better with a weapon and a kind word than a kind word alone.

Frank Gallagher - Season 3 Episode 2

Weapons

Too many Gallaghers in the world already. Instead of passing rubbers out at your school, they should be passing them out at your house.

Kevin Ball - Season 2 Episode 10

Teenagers. They're hormon-soaked brains aren't wired to think about anyone other than themselves.

Veronica Fisher - Season 2 Episode 6

Teenagers

Ethel: "One day the entire family will be reunited in the Garden of Eden."
"Oh, like heaven?"
Ethel: "No, it's in Missouri."
"Oh. Eden's got a lot of methheads."

Season 2 Episode 5

Missouri

That's the Gallagher sperm. Ambitious, relentless. Everything we're not once we're born. Like heat-seeking, baby-making missiles. Won't be long before the country's nothing but Mexicans and Gallaghers.

Frank Gallagher - Season 2 Episode 5

Frank: "Why you gotta be such an asshole?"
Lip: "Apple fell where you dropped it."

Phillip Gallagher - Season 2 Episode 4

Vaginas

V: "You always pick pussies!"
Fiona: "Well, they are what they eat."

Fiona Gallagher - Season 2 Episode 4

Vaginas

I'm gonna beat you like a piñata till candy flies out of your ass!

Lucy Joe Heisner - Season 2 Episode 4

Funny Threats

Clare: "Thank you. God loves you."
Veronica: "Yeah, if that were true, he'd have made me white and rich."

Veronica Fisher - Season 2 Episode 2

Every day you wake up breathing, you should be coloring me a note of gratitude that the half of you that came from me wasn't spooged on your mother's neck, but instead was guided by yours truly to get up inside of her to start the life of you.

Frank Gallagher - Season 2 Episode 2

Carl Gallagher

Frank: "It's not sex if you can't remember it."
Kev: "Ha. Then you're a virgin, Frank."

Kevin Ball - Season 2 Episode 2

Frank Gallagher

Lip: "You really wanna get your ass shot off in some 'stan somewhere?"
Ian: "'Stan?"
Lip: "Yeah, Pakistan, Afghanistan, Iraqistan."

Phillip Gallagher - Season 2 Episode 1

You just made my boy parts get bigger.

Kevin Ball - Season 1 Episode 11

Sheila: "Now, by sifting we separate and aerate those flour particles to make them absorb liquids better."
Deb: "Someone should sift my dad."

Debbie Gallagher - Season 1 Episode 9

Frank Gallagher

Frank doesn't have friends, only people he hasn't pissed off yet.

Fiona Gallagher - Season 1 Episode 7

Frank Gallagher

Karen: "Why do we help people we hate?"
Lip: "I believe we're just taking our cue from American foreign policy."

Phillip Gallagher - Season 1 Episode 6

I am fed up with these pan-gender hermaphrodites who hate that human beings are a species with two distinct genders. It's like they've declared war on testicles. They wanna remove all the masculinity from the schools, fill the world with yogurt-eaters.

Frank Gallagher - Season 1 Episode 6

Oh, Warren, once again proving that Koreans are the Asian Jews.

Phillip Gallagher - Season 1 Episode 6

South Korea

We all have our phobias and school is mine. All of it. Textbooks full of falsehoods, teachers unions full of thugs, and tenured imbeciles who still use words like "irregardless".

Frank Gallagher - Season 1 Episode 6

Veronica: "What's that smell? It's either vomit or fancy cheese."
Carl: "It can be both if you want."

Carl Gallagher - Season 1 Episode 5

Fiona: "Wasn't he drunk when he proposed?"
Veronica: "Yeah, it was like David Hasselhoff video, eating a cheeseburger. YouTube it, it's a car wreck."

Veronica Fisher - Season 1 Episode 5

David Hasselhoff

Why are all the news ladies Chinese? They should stick to what they know: railroads, sushi and dim sum.

Frank Gallagher - Season 1 Episode 4

China

Like, up the ass? Do you get used to that? I mean, the whole point of the digestive system is one-way traffic.

Phillip Gallagher - Season 1 Episode 1

Ass

Frank: "Four-month-old baby, 14-year-old girl, 11-year-old Lip, 10-year-old Ian, a 7-year-old, a 5-year-old, and a Dodge Astro van. What's the one thing that we needed? One word. One thing."
Jimmy: "Sterilization."

Jimmy Lishman - Season 1 Episode 1

I lose respect for guys like Steve, because people unlike Steve, or people diametrically opposite to Steve have always let me down. So deciding that he's overeducated and has more money than sense is somehow more socially acceptable than asking myself, for instance, why do the men I always date treat me like shit?

Jimmy Lishman - Season 1 Episode 1

Jimmy: "Your dad made me follow you up. Gave me a condom."
Fiona: "He must really like you. He usually just gives my boyfriends a dental dam."

Fiona Gallagher - Season 1 Episode 1

Phillip: "Did he pitch a tent?"
Karen: "Huh?"
Phillip: "Did you make him hard?"
Karen: "Ever try to play pool with a rope?"

Karen Jackson - Season 1 Episode 1

Penisses

Ninety percent of the world's problems are caused by tiny words that come in pairs. I mean, we're healthy and we're happy, but when people as, we say: 'Not bad.'

Jimmy Lishman - Season 1 Episode 1

Quotes about Shameless

A director will always tell you, when you go in to do a scene, "You go as big as you want, and I'll tell you when to come down." And I found that on "Shameless", you can't follow that rule because they will never tell you to come down. So, I've had to find my own balance with when it makes sense to get this upset or angry.

Jeremy Allen White

The best Quotes from Shameless

Quotes about Shameless

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