The best Quotes and Sayings about Sex

If you want more sex, just ask for it.

Sheldon: "You do understand that our efforts here will in no way increase the odds of having sexual congress with this woman?"
Leonard: "Men do things for women without expecting sex."
Sheldon: "Those would be men who just had sex."

Don't do drugs, don't have unprotected sex, don't be violent... leave that to me.

You can't ruin a friendship with sex. That's like trying to ruin ice cream with chocolate sprinkles

No wonder the city never sleeps, it's too busy trying to get laid.

Caus' you see, for me, sex is a sport, like racquetball. Play hard for half an hour, work up a sweat and hope you don't get hit in the eye.

I don't know what's better gettin' laid or gettin' paid.

Orgasms don't send you Valentine's cards and don't hold your hand in a sad movie.

Sex is not a time to chat. It's one of the few instances in my overly articulated, exceedingly verbal life, where it is perfectly appropriate, if not preferable, to shut up.

I'm sorry, but the fact that the sexual pleasure center of your cerebral cortex has been over-stimulated by spirochetes is a poor basis for a relationship.

Tell a man: "I hate you" - you'II have the best sex of your Iife. But tell him: "I Iove you" - you'II probably never see him again.

I don't make love. I f-ck... hard.

When choosing sexual partners, remember: talent is not sexually transmittable.

You know, it has been 17 days since I've "enjoyed" you. And I assume it's been months since you've enjoyed me.

Robin: "Have plans with Don on Saturday, he's making me Chinese."
Lily: "I'll assume you're talking about food, otherwise, I have some follow-up-questions."

Love is the answer. But while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.

A sexy glance beats a b-job every time.

There is no aphrodisiac like innocence.

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man.

Amanda: "Sex makes everything more complicated. Even not having it, because the not having it makes it complicated."
Graham: "That's why it's better to have it... some say."

Abstinence is a healthy choice, that many teens will make. Either by choice, or, as I can attest, by circumstance.

We've had sex 23 days straight. I've seen more ceiling than Michelangelo!

It's like my grandmother always said: An erect penis doesn't have a conscience.

Samantha: "I think it's sad the way she's using a child to validate her existence."
Carrie: "Exactly. Why can't she just use sex and a nice cocktail like the rest of us?"

Samantha: "Threesomes are huge right now, they're the blow job of the '90s."
Charlotte: "What was the blow job of the '80s?"
Samantha: "Anal sex."

Brokers give investment advice. Architects - design advice. Single people give married friends tidbits from their sexual escapades.

I am not "with" Nora. Wrong Preposition! Later tonight I'm hoping to be "on" Nora, right? Or "under" Nora. Am I right? Or, we're all adults, so I'll just say it: "behind" Nora.

Sex now, we'll do the foreplay after.

Children are God's way of punishing us for having sex.

Sex and a cocktail: they both lasted about as long, had the same effect, and amounted to the same thing.

Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex.

No, you dingbat. You don't just go groping away. You gotta pre-heat the oven before you stick in the turkey.

Men, the one thing they're good for, they're not good at.

Sometimes, I think sex is the root of all evil.

A terrible sex life is like a virus. Your marriage can be healthy in all other aspects, but once the sex dies out, it starts to infect all the other parts of your relationship.

Nobody wants to have to have sex with the same person forever.

The sex drive is the most important and powerful behaviour in mankind.

Sex is for anyone; the aftermath is for lovers.

I have two ambitions in life: one is to drink every pub dry, the other is to sleep with every woman on earth.

I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.

Men who are too good looking are never good in bed because they never had to be.

Sex without love is merely healthy exercise.

The conversation between your fingers and someone else's skin. This is the most important discussion you can ever have.

Sex is more exciting on the screen and between the pages than between the sheets.

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.

Discouraging premarital sex is against my religion.

Talking to a woman that you have already had sex with, is like changing the oil on a rental car!

I don't feel so good. It's like my testicals mixed poprocks and soda.

Ted, the only reason to wait a month for sex is if the girl is 17 years and 11 months old.