Sheldon: "You do understand that our efforts here will in no way increase the odds of having sexual congress with this woman?"
Leonard: "Men do things for women without expecting sex."
Sheldon: "Those would be men who just had sex."
Don't do drugs, don't have unprotected sex, don't be violent... leave that to me.Violence, DrugsEminem
You can't ruin a friendship with sex. That's like trying to ruin ice cream with chocolate sprinklesIce CreamRajesh Koothrappali in The Big Bang Theory, Season 5 Episode 1
No wonder the city never sleeps, it's too busy trying to get laid.New York CityCarrie Bradshaw in Sex And The City, Season 1 Episode 11
Caus' you see, for me, sex is a sport, like racquetball. Play hard for half an hour, work up a sweat and hope you don't get hit in the eye.Perry Cox in Scrubs, Season 2 Episode 2
Orgasms don't send you Valentine's cards and don't hold your hand in a sad movie.Valentine's DayCharlotte York in Sex And The City, Season 2 Episode 4
Sex is not a time to chat. It's one of the few instances in my overly articulated, exceedingly verbal life, where it is perfectly appropriate, if not preferable, to shut up.Miranda Hobbes in Sex And The City, Season 2 Episode 2
I'm sorry, but the fact that the sexual pleasure center of your cerebral cortex has been over-stimulated by spirochetes is a poor basis for a relationship.RelationshipsGregory House in Dr. House, Season 1 Episode 8
Tell a man: "I hate you" - you'II have the best sex of your Iife. But tell him: "I Iove you" - you'II probably never see him again.Men, Singles & DatingSamantha Jones in Sex And The City, Season 2 Episode 10
Oh, this dress is totally going to get me laid on my wedding night.Lily Aldrin in How I Met Your Mother, Season 1 Episode 16
When choosing sexual partners, remember: talent is not sexually transmittable.Tina Fey
You know, it has been 17 days since I've "enjoyed" you. And I assume it's been months since you've enjoyed me.Doug Heffernan in King of Queens, Season 1 Episode 1
Robin: "Have plans with Don on Saturday, he's making me Chinese."
Lily: "I'll assume you're talking about food, otherwise, I have some follow-up-questions."
Love is the answer. But while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.LoveWoody Allen
There is no aphrodisiac like innocence.Jean Baudrillard
Amanda: "Sex makes everything more complicated. Even not having it, because the not having it makes it complicated."
Graham: "That's why it's better to have it... some say."
Abstinence is a healthy choice, that many teens will make. Either by choice, or, as I can attest, by circumstance.TeenagersJohn Oliver (Last Week Tonight), Sex Education
We've had sex 23 days straight. I've seen more ceiling than Michelangelo!Lynette Scavo in Desperate Housewives, Season 5 Episode 21
It's like my grandmother always said: An erect penis doesn't have a conscience.PenissesGabrielle Solis in Desperate Housewives, Season 1 Episode 1
Samantha: "I think it's sad the way she's using a child to validate her existence."
Carrie: "Exactly. Why can't she just use sex and a nice cocktail like the rest of us?"
Samantha: "Threesomes are huge right now, they're the blow job of the '90s."
Charlotte: "What was the blow job of the '80s?"
Samantha: "Anal sex."
Brokers give investment advice. Architects - design advice. Single people give married friends tidbits from their sexual escapades.Singles & DatingCarrie Bradshaw in Sex And The City, Season 1 Episode 3
I am not "with" Nora. Wrong Preposition! Later tonight I'm hoping to be "on" Nora, right? Or "under" Nora. Am I right? Or, we're all adults, so I'll just say it: "behind" Nora.Barney Stinson in How I Met Your Mother, Season 6 Episode 18
Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex.Bill Maher
No, you dingbat. You don't just go groping away. You gotta pre-heat the oven before you stick in the turkey.American Pie - 2, by Michelle Flaherty
Sometimes, I think sex is the root of all evil.Anatomy of a Scandal, Season 1 Episode 1
A terrible sex life is like a virus. Your marriage can be healthy in all other aspects, but once the sex dies out, it starts to infect all the other parts of your relationship.Colleen Hoover in Verity
Nobody wants to have to have sex with the same person forever.Mindy Chen in Emily in Paris, Season 1 Episode 2
The sex drive is the most important and powerful behaviour in mankind.Richard Ramirez
I have two ambitions in life: one is to drink every pub dry, the other is to sleep with every woman on earth.AlcoholOliver Reed
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.Alcohol, Enjoying, Smoking, Funny QuotesJohnny Carson
Men who are too good looking are never good in bed because they never had to be.BeautySarah Jessica Parker
Sex without love is merely healthy exercise.Robert A. Heinlein
The conversation between your fingers and someone else's skin. This is the most important discussion you can ever have.FingersIain Thomas
Sex is more exciting on the screen and between the pages than between the sheets.Andy Warhol
Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.Woody Allen
Discouraging premarital sex is against my religion.Barney Stinson in How I Met Your Mother, Season 2 Episode 12
Talking to a woman that you have already had sex with, is like changing the oil on a rental car!Barney Stinson in How I Met Your Mother, Season 3 Episode 14
I don't feel so good. It's like my testicals mixed poprocks and soda.Ted Mosby in How I Met Your Mother, Season 1 Episode 14