Quotes from Scrubs (Page 2)

Because nothing sucks more than feeling all alone, no matter how many people are around.

Did you actually just page me to find out how much Tylenol to give to Mrs. Lensner? It's regular-strength tylenol. Here's what you do. Get her to open her mouth, take a handful, and throw it at her. Whatever sticks, that's the correct dosage.

I'm gonna go ahead and write you a prescription for two testicles; and you feel free to get this filled out whenever you want.

Carla: "Why is there a pancake in the silverware drawer?"
Turk: "I think you mean, why is there silverware in the pancake drawer?"

I love this moment so much, I want to have sex with it.

Either this kid's got a light bulb up his butt, or his colon has a great idea.

Caus' you see, for me, sex is a sport, like racquetball. Play hard for half an hour, work up a sweat and hope you don't get hit in the eye.

What has two thumbs and doesn't give a crap? Bob Kelso. How ya doin'.