Quotes and Sayings about Sarcasm

Leonard: "For God's sake, Sheldon, do I have to... hold up a sarcasm sign every time I open my mouth?"
Sheldon: "You have a sarcasm sign?"

Sheldon Cooper in The Big Bang Theory - Season 1 Episode 2

What? Scott, come on. I'm 147 pounds of pale skin and fragile bone, okay? Sarcasm is my only defense.

Stiles Stilinski in Teen Wolf

My way of joking is to tell the truth. It's the funniest joke in the World.

George Bernard Shaw

Truth

Sarcastic people tend to be marshmallows underneath the armor.

Stephen King in 11/22/63

Ellie: "Did everyone have boats back then?"
Joel: "Yeah. I had a sixty foot yacht."
Ellie: "Really?"
Joel: "No."
Ellie: "Sarcasm... making progress."

Ellie Williams in The Last of Us

CC: "When do you find out if you got into college early? I would really love to help you pack."
Wyatt: "I detect sarcasm, which is universally regarded as the lowest form of humor."

Family Switch

"Really?"
"No. I'm being ironic. Or is it sarcastic? I can never remember."
"Irony's cleverer, so you're probably being sarcastic."

Jonathan Stroud in Lockwood & Co. - 1: The Screaming Staircase

Irony

People who can put on a serious face while joking are the scariest.

Shirou Emiya in Fate/stay night

Humor & Comedy

I don't appreciate your lack of sarcasm.

Louise Belcher in Bob's Burgers - Season 4 Episode 7

You know what's never saved the planet? Your sarcasm.

Phastos in Eternals

We are suffering from too much sarcasm.

Marianne Moore

You know, they say sarcasm is a metric for potential. If that's true, you'll be a great man some day.

Howard Stark in Captain America - Civil War

The most efficient form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids.

Jill Bensley

Children & Childhood

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If you can't laugh at yourself, life is going to seem a whole lot longer than you'd like.

Sam in Garden State

Laughing & Smile Humor & Comedy

He who can make people laugh has to be taken seriously; all people with power know that.

Werner Finck

Laughing & Smile Humor & Comedy Satire

If you can't make it better, you can laugh at it.

Erma Bombeck

Laughing & Smile Humor & Comedy

Nonsense wakes up the brain cells. And it helps develop a sense of humor, which is awfully important in this day and age.

Theodor Seuss Geisel

Humor & Comedy Craziness & Weirdness

There is nothing in the world so irresistibly contagious as laughter and good humor.

Charles Dickens

Life Love Humor & Comedy

Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth, the air and you.

Langston Hughes

Summer Humor & Comedy Air

A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.

Roald Dahl

Humor & Comedy

My parents armed me with an amazing sense of humor, and it's what you need when, well, it's what anyone needs in this world.

Warwick Davis

Humor & Comedy

People confuse the subject of the joke with the target of the joke, and they're very rarely the same.

Ricky Gervais

Humor & Comedy

Sutton: "Great for Jane, but didn't we stop saying diva like two years ago?"
Kat: "Oh, we're back to saying it ironically."
Sutton: "Our generation is exhausting."

Sutton Brady-Hunter in The Bold Type

Irony

Old age is a wonderful source of irony.

Aemon Targaryen in Game of Thrones - Season 4 Episode 9

Age Irony

I am known for my sense of irony but even I would not have come to think of putting a Statue of Liberty into the New York Harbour.

George Bernard Shaw

USA New York City Irony

Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony.

Morpheus in The Matrix

Irony

Definition: What is a cynic? A man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.

HK-47 in Star Wars Games - Knights of the Old Republic

Cynicism

The biggest hurdle that our communities have is cynicism - saying it's a done deal, who cares; there's no point to voting.

Alexandria Ocasio Cortez

Cynicism Elections & Voting

Cynicism, to me, is trying to make people as unhappy as you are.

Ricky Gervais

Cynicism

Leonard: "I've dated plenty of women. There was Joyce Kim... Leslie Winkle..."
Sheldon: "Notify the editors of the Oxford English Dictionary. The word 'plenty' has been redefined to mean 'two.'"

Sheldon Cooper in The Big Bang Theory - Season 2 Episode 2

Leslie Winkle

That's the great thing about California, you can almost go to the mountains and almost go to the beach on the same day.

Leonard Hofstadter in The Big Bang Theory - Season 11 Episode 11

California

See, that's the problem. You–you don't care about getting hurt. But you know how I'll feel? I'll be devastated. And if you die, I will literally go out of my freakin' mind. You see, death doesn't happen to you, Lydia. It happens to everyone around you, okay? To all the people left standing at your funeral, trying to figure out how they're gonna live the rest of their lives now without you in it?

Stiles Stilinski in Teen Wolf - Season 2

Lydia: "Are you okay? I guess you are, aren't you? For someone who would put their own name on a hit-list..."
Meredith: "I had to."
Lydia: "Why?"
Meredith: "Because I heard you-- I heard you scream in the tunnels at Oak Creek. That's why I knew it was the right time... to start over."
Lydia: "But with Peter?"
Meredith: "He's the Alpha. He's always been the Alpha. He'll make it right. It never was for us-- so many people die because of us. We're the monsters. Even Banshees. Even me."
Lydia: "I don't believe that. Not all monsters do monstrous things."
Meredith: "Like who?"
Lydia: "Like Scott"
Meredith: "Like you"

Meredith Walker in Teen Wolf - Season 4 Episode 10

You see things; and you say 'Why?"
But I dream things that never were; and I say 'Why not?"

George Bernard Shaw

Dreaming Optimism Positive Quotes

Lies are comforting. Truth is painful.

Rebecca Yarros in The Empyrean - Fourth Wing

Lies Truth

I fled out of the deep night - the deep night of the protected child-life , and tugged into the bright Day - the bright day of being-grownup

Stephen King in It

Youth

But I believe in love, you know; love is a uniquely portable magic. I don’t think it’s in the stars, but I do believe that blood calls to blood and mind calls to mind and heart to heart.

Stephen King in 11/22/63

Love

If somehow the Lord gave me a second chance at that moment... I would do it all over again.

Joel Miller in The Last of Us - Part II

I know you mean well. I know you wanna protect me. You have. And when we're done, we'll go wherever you want. Tommy's, sheep ranch, the moon... I'll follow you anywhere you go. But there's no halfway with this. We finish what we started.

Ellie Williams in The Last of Us - Season 1 Episode 9

Emma: "How do we play the song without sheet music?"
Bill: "How did Luke Skywalker blow up the Death Star without his computer?"
Emma: "I don't know what that means. I was born in 2008."

Family Switch

Quotes about Star Wars

"Well," Lockwood said, "if you judge success by the number of enemies you make, that was a highly successful evening."

Jonathan Stroud in Lockwood & Co. - 2: The Whispering Skull

To be honest, adults are pretty useless. 'Cause of their lack of sensitivity. They just get in the way.

Lucy Carlyle in Lockwood & Co. - Season 1 Episode 1

Someday my memories will fade… and her voice, her actions, I might forget them as well. But I will always remember that I loved Saber.

Shirou Emiya in Fate/stay night

Turns out dad's been putting murdered cows in our hamburgers.

Louise Belcher in Bob's Burgers - Season 1 Episode 3

Cows

Bob: "Hey, no nagging my customers!"
Linda: "Don't you yell at my mother!"
Bob: "What's that, Nagatha Christie?"

Bob Belcher in Bob's Burgers - Season 1 Episode 2

Ikaris: "I bet you've built the perfect safe house. And what's this even made of - Vibranium?"
Phastos: "Fall collection. IKEA."

Phastos in Eternals

IKEA

We have watched and guided. We have helped them progress, and seen them accomplish wonders. Throughout the years, we have never interfered. Until now.

Ajak in Eternals

Poetry is the art of creating imaginary gardens with real toads.

Marianne Moore

Black Widow: "I don't know, the truth is a matter of circumstances. It's not all things to all people all the time, and neither am I."
Captain America: "That's a tough way to live."
Black Widow: "It's a good way not to die though."

Black Widow in Captain America - The Winter Soldier

Truth

Stark: "Red, green, blue... who paints a button blue?"
Carter: "Don't tell me the American playboy needs help pushing buttons."
Stark: "Hedy Lamarr and I spent a weekend together, but she wasn't teaching me German."

Howard Stark in What If…? - Season 1 Episode 1

Hedy Lamarr

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