Haven't Luke Skywalker and Santa Claus affected your lives more than most real people in this room? I mean, whether Jesus is real or not, he's had a bigger impact on the world than any of us have. And the same could be said of Bugs Bunny... and Superman and Harry Potter. They've changed my life, changed the way I act on the Earth. Doesn't that make them kind of real?ImaginationKyle Broflovski in South Park, Season 11 Episode 12
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.Funny Quotes, Bad GirlsGeorge Carlin
I still believe in Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and true love. Don't even try to tell me different.Easter Bunny, Tooth FairyDolly Parton
Parker, I'm your mother. Mothers don't lie to their sons. Now go wash your hands or santa's not gonna bring you anything for christmas.Mother, Mother & SonLynette Scavo in Desperate Housewives, Season 2 Episode 19
Don't be surprised if you wake up in a big brown bag one day. That only means that Santa finally fulfilled my wish.Unknown
Santa can't always give a child what they want. 'Cause the child will grow up, become an adult, and realize that a Chanel bag costs a month's wage for most people. Which is the result of just a few people having far too much money.ChanelJulestorm - A Storm for Christmas - Season 1 Episode 2, by Alex - The Santa
On a very special night every year, legend has it that a jolly old man in a red suit flies through the air and brings gifts, laughter, and joy to children everywhere.Holy NightI Believe in Santa
I'm sending you this message in times of capitalism, consumption and presents to remind you of the true meaning of Christmas:
The birth of Santa Claus. Merry Christmas!
A Christian telling an atheist they're going to hell is as scary as a child telling an adult they're not getting any presents from Santa.Atheism, HölleRicky Gervais
Why are you so serious? What's wrong with believing and liking stuff like Santa Claus and magic, even when you're a bit older?MagicLee Eul / Ryu Min-hyuk in The Sound of Magic, Season 1 Episode 1
On Christmas Eve, many years ago, I lay quietly in my bed. I did not rustle the sheets. I breathed slowly and silently. I was listening for a sound I was afraid I'd never hear. The ringing bells of Santa's sleigh.The Polar Express
May you never be too grown up to search the skies on Christmas Eve.ChristmasUnknown
Dear Santa, I have been nice all year.
Most of the time.
Once in awhile.
Never mind, I'll buy my own stuff.
Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas. You know, the birth of Santa?Matt Groening
Dear Santa, before I explain... how much do you know already?Unknown
Who can eat millions of cookies in one night and not get fat? Well, I can.CookiesThe Christmas Chronicles, by Santa Claus
The village houses over a million elves. Now, if you combine Amazon, FedEx, the postal service, and UPS with every manufacturing company in the world, and they quadrupled their output for an entire year, well, you just might be getting close to what we can accomplish here in Santa's Village in a single day.The Christmas Chronicles - 2, by Santa Claus
I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.Dick Gregory
"Is Santa Claus real?"
Alexa: "All I know is that someone has been eating all my cookies."
Just saw a three-year-old with a t-shirt saying: "Santa doesn't exist. But that's okay, I can't read."Unknown
My parents told me not to lie. All I'm saying is: Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy.Funny Quotes, Easter Bunny, Tooth FairyUnknown
Santa Claus has the right idea: Visit people only once a year.Victor Borge
Of course there is a Santa Claus. It's just that no single somebody could do all he has to do. So the Lord has spread the task among us all. That's why everybody is Santa Claus. I am. You are.Truman Capote
They err who thinks Santa Claus comes down through the chimney; he really enters through the heart.Unknown