The best Quotes by Sandy Cohen

What can he possibly have done, that he rather go to jail than admit to?
Unless... life with Julie Cooper is tougher than we thought.

Sandy: "You're not exactly the ideal client."
Caleb: "Rich? Powerful?"
Sandy: "Guilty!"

You know what I like about rich kids? Nothing!

Ryan: "Maybe you've got the Summer flu."
Seth: "I dunno. It's possible."
Ryan: "Maybe you need some Annabiotics."

Congratulations. You're a Cohen. Welcome to a life of insecurity and paralyzing self-doubt.

Her with a tattoo, you with a wristband. That's like the ultimate wrong-side-of-the-tracks love story. Seriously, you are the Sid to her Nancy, the Kurt to her Courtney. The 50 Cent to... Mrs. Cent.

Summer: "I'm busy. Studying. Naked."
Seth: "Is that supposed to keep me away?"
Summer: "Cohen? You're at my house!"
Seth: "And you're dressed. I wonder who's more disappointed."

It turns out that I'm quite skilled at getting a date, provided it's not for me.

Sandy: "The minute you were born, I knew that I would never take another easy breath again without knowing that you were safe."
Seth: "So, I'm like asthma?"

Summer: "I wish I could pluck out my eyeballs with a fork and rinse them in a tall glass of ice water."
Marissa: "Yeah, that's a hangover."

Summer: "So you're making a mixtape for his birthday? That's so romantic!"
Marissa: "No, just thoughtful."
Summer: "Coop, you're tapping into core relationship mythology. That's romantic."

Seth: "I'm in charge of Ryan's birthday."
Summer: "Wait. Ryan's birthday is now? What was he thinking?"
Seth: "I don't know. He didn't exactly plan it."

A vicodin love confession is still a love confession.

It doesn't matter, I'm too tired to care.

Summer: "We have to do something. Should we bring him a snack? What does Ryan eat?"
Seth: "Dry cereal from a box and black coffee."

I hope you have Motrin in the house, because you're about to feel pain!

How can you live like this? Your t-shirts are touching your sweaters!

I suffer from rage blackouts.

Comicon is basically a bunch of pathetic virgins ogling some p-rn star dressed as Catwoman.

Modern medicine is advancing to the point where the average human life span will be a hundred. But I read this article which said Social Security is supposed to run out by the year 2025, which means people are gonna have to stay in their jobs until they're 80. So I don't wanna commit to anything too soon.

When you lose everything, that's when you're finally free.