You're gonna move the ocean into the desert? That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard, unless they do it while Burning Man is happening. In which case, go for it. Please take a bath, you dirty hippies!
More by Ronny Chieng
All 11 Quotes →It's the 4th of July, that time of year when Americans who don't watch MSNBC, celebrate the nation's birthday.Don't stereotype Asian people. Also, there's a good chance they're doctors, so they can help you out if you are worried.I love getting in a Halloween spirit. I buy candy, and when trick-or-treaters come to my door, I eat it in their faces, to show that nothing in life is free!