Quotes by Ron Swanson

If you don't believe in love, what's the point of living?

I once worked with a guy for three years and never learned his name. Best friend I ever had. We still never talk sometimes.

There's only one thing I hate more than lying: skim milk. Which is water that is lying about being milk.

Dear frozen yogurt, you are the celery of desserts. Be ice cream, or be nothing.

Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets.

There has never been a sadness that can't be cured by breakfast food.