The United Kingdom... birthplace of The Beatles and yet very much, the world's Ringo.
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
The UK... earth's least magic kingdom.
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
Though, Belgium does have one thing in common with Budweiser, historically speaking: Germans refuse to acknowledge it's even there.
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
Israel... drama-wise the opposite of Canada.
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
Saudi Arabia... the country with bans on pork, alcohol and p*rn - or, as it's known in America: a Florida Breakfast.
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
Russia... the future home of 45 million Ukrainians.
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
Russia... the country that gave the world Tetris, merkins you wear on your heads, and potentially the 45th President of the United States.
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
1Germany... a country whose idea of a bedtime story is two children being left to die in the forest, before nearly being cooked and eaten and then murdering an old woman.
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
2Sweden. Who hasn't spent 20 minutes in IKEA and immediately wanted to launch an attack on Sweden?
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
Norway... the left t-sticle in the frigid sea p-nis of Scandinavia.
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
Brazil... the country with the second most valuable Amazon on earth.
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
Brazil... home of that one famous statue that I don't know the name of, 'cause I'm too embarrassed to google, "come at me bro jesus statue".
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
Life isn't just a fairytale land of alpacas and pan flutes, Peru!
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
Canada - what you'd get if America and Britain had a baby they abandoned in the snow.
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
Ireland... Europe's Boston.
John Oliver (Last Week Tonight)
You can leave Boston, but it will never leave you.
They say money can't buy happiness. But it can book your flight to Boston - which is kinda the same.
Serge Gnabry's double sinks Lyon. The Bayern Munich juggernaut rolls on. He made the difference to set up a mouthwatering final with Paris Saint-Germain on Sunday and leave Hansi Flick dreaming of the perfect finale to his debut season as the Bayern manager.
The Guardian - August 2020
1Being president doesn’t change who you are; it reveals who you are.
Michelle Obama - August 2020, Democratic National Convention
1Let's speak the truth: People are protesting because Black people have been treated as less than human in America. Because our country has never fully addressed the systemic racism that has plagued our country since its earliest days. It is the duty of every American to fix. In times like this, silence is complicity.
Kamala Harris - June 2020
1The most messed up thing the universe will ever do to you, is let you meet the right person at the wrong time.
I usually agree with what God did, but putting limits on intelligence without putting limits on stupidity wasn't a great move.
I just had an epiphany. You're all to scared to talk to other cultures. And really that's just arrogance. No actually. Its racism. You don't want to understand?"
(Lachlan Cryer)
1To love thy quote
(Lachlan Cryer)
1Do I need to turn you off? Like ditch the phone?
(Lachlan Cryer)
1Don't come online as an all masquerading hero and break my peace Facebook!
(Lachlan Cryer)
1Putting your intention into another's head is called RACISM
(Lachlan Cryer)
1He traded sand for skins, skins for gold, gold for life. In the end, he traded life for sand.
Magic: The Gathering - Squandered Resources
2There is no 'I' in 'team', but there is a 'we' in 'weapon'.
Magic: The Gathering () - Catapult Master
4I love the kind of hugs where you can physically feel the sadness leaving your body.
I believe in Europe. I am convinced by Europe. Not only as a heritage from the past, but as hope and a vision for the future.
Angela Merkel (as Chancellor of Germany) - July 2020, Speech at the European Parliament
2We must now realize the promise of America by trusting God, unifying our vision and building our future. I am running for president of the United States.
Kanye West - July 2020
1Good night, good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be morrow.
Don't think for a moment that I'm really like any of the characters I've played. I'm not. That's why it's called 'acting'.
If there hadn't been women we'd still be squatting in a cave eating raw meat, because we made civilization in order to impress our girlfriends.
I think school is so much harder than real life. People are so much more accepting when they are adults.
I'm going to college. I don't care if it ruins my career. I'd rather be smart than a movie star.
I like America to some extent.
Greenland is not for sale.
Mette Frederiksen - August 2019, about Donald Trump's idea of buying Greenland
1It seemed the more I knew about people the more I knew about the strange magic hidden in their hearts.
Perhaps the best god would be like a woman, because only women really knew how to forgive.