Quotes by Phoebe Buffay

Joey: 'I'm having new headshows taken tomorrow,right? And the photographer said that she thinks I should have my eyebrows waxed. Is that weird for a guy?'
Phoebe: 'Well, it depends.'
Joey: 'On?'
Phoebe: 'On how far along he is in the sex change process.'

Joey: 'Can you close that window, Chandler? My nipples could cut glass over here.'
Phoebe: 'Wait, really? 'Cause mine get me out of tickets.'

I wish I could, but I don't want to.

Phoebe: "I was the last to know when you had a crush on Joey when he was moving in."
Joey: "What?"
Phoebe: "Oh, looks like I was second to last."

Joey: 'Pheebs, wanna help?'
Phoebe: 'I wish I could, but I don't want to.'