The best Quotes by Philip Banks

A real man takes responsibility for his actions. A real man knows when to let go of his pride and make the most out of his second chance.

A hard head makes for a soft behind.

Phillip Banks: "Penn State would've been my first choice if my applications to Princeton, Yale, and Talledega Tech had fallen through."
Dr. Hoover: "You must have been an athlete in your thinner days."

Why are we working so hard to save a boy who doesn't want to be saved?

Will: "Come on Uncle Phil, you're gonna ruin my rep."
Uncle Phil: "You're only 17, you don't have a rep yet."

Carlton, you are grounded for a month. Will, added to the month that you already have, it should take you into Fiscal '91.

Carlton: "Within an hour, I'll have a gorgeous date and a great Halloween costume."
Will: "You better buy the mask first!"

Will: "Carlton, I misjudged you. You're a lot cooler than I thought. Hey, you wanna go to the club with us tonight?"
Carlton: "I don't have a date."
Will: "Carlton, never bring a sandwich to a buffet!"

Will: "What's so funny?"
Hilary: "Carlton just told a joke."
Will: "No, Hilary, Carlton is a joke."

Dad, don't do anything stupid! You haven't updated your will yet.

Carlton: "If it looks like a duck, sounds like a duck, and smells like a duck, what is it?"
Will: "Your prom date?"

Vivian: "Excuse me. I'm looking for that store with the safari clothes. I can't remember the name, but I think there's some type of produce in it."
"Banana Republic."
Vivian: "That's it. Thank you."

Any time you see a white guy in jail, you know he did something bad.

Congratulate me. It took all day, but I finally found the perfect pair of alligator pumps to wear to the "Save the Everglades" dinner tonight.

Carlton: "I'm sick of being such a big loser."
Will: "Aw, C... you're not big."

Oh my god, Carlton! What's that hideous thing growing out of your neck? Ah, never mind. It's just your head.

I found that any game can be made interesting if you put some money on it.

Man, I love Halloween. It's the only time of year when a black man can wear a mask at night and not get arrested!

What kind of idiot picks a password no one can guess?

Girl, you look so good, I would marry your brother just to get in your family.

Phillip Banks: "Going to college isn't just about finding a job. It's about finding yourself, and finding what you do best that makes a contribution to the community. It shouldn't be just about money."
Will: "You really believe that, Uncle Phil?"
Phillip Banks: "Yes, son, I really do."
Will: "Then how do you explain becoming a lawyer?"

Girl, yo feet must be tired cause you've been running through my mind all day.

Maybe I sometimes say things that are selfish and self-centered, but that's who I am, dammit.

Girl, the way you looking so good, I wish just I could plant you and grow a whole field of ya'll.

This town will try to make you forget who you are and where you came from. Don't let it do that!

We have a different set of rules here, okay? If you want to do well, just keep your head down and follow my lead.

Man, you know I'm gonna rep West Philly wherever I go.

Fifty bucks? I could take like... 25 women out to dinner!

Hey baby, I noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to put you on notice that I noticed you too.

Girl, don't hate me 'cause I'm beautiful!

I know you can hear me with ears that big.

Well, someone has her rude hat on tonight.

Phillip Banks: "Geoffrey, bring me my tools."
Geoffrey: "Do you mean your knife and fork, sir?"

When you lose everything, that's when you're finally free.