The best Quotes from Parks and Recreation

The best Quotes from Parks and Recreation

Parks and Recreation (also known as Parks and Rec) is an American political satire mockumentary sitcom television series created by Greg Daniels and Michael Schur.

Jogging is the worst. I know it keeps you healthy, but God, at what cost?

Ann Perkins - Season 4 Episode 7

One time my refrigerator stopped working. I didn't know what to do. I just moved.

Tom Haverford - Season 5 Episode 19

If you don't believe in love, what's the point of living?

Ron Swanson

I once worked with a guy for three years and never learned his name. Best friend I ever had. We still never talk sometimes.

Ron Swanson - Season 3 Episode 2

What I hear when I'm being yelled at is people caring really loudly at me.

Leslie Knope

I would like a glass of red wine and I'll take the cheapest one you have because I can't tell the difference.

Leslie Knope

I'm big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.

Leslie Knope

I'm going to tell you a secret about everyone else's job: no one knows what they are doing. Deep down, everyone is just faking it until they figure it out.

April Ludgate

No matter what I do, literally nothing bad can happen to me. I'm like a white, male U.S. Senator.

Leslie Knope

Calzones are pointless. They're just pizza that's harder to eat. No one likes them.

Leslie Knope

Ugh. I hate talking to people about things.

April Ludgate

I'm allergic to sushi. Every time I eat more than 80 sushis, I barf.

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The raccoon problem is under control. They have their part of the town and we have ours.

Leslie Knope

I don't want to be overdramatic, but today felt like a hundred years in hell and the absolute worst day of my life.

Leslie Knope

I stand behind my decision to avoid salad and other disgusting things.

Leslie Knope

Guys love it when you can show them you're better than they are at something they love.

Leslie Knope

Halloween is my favorite holiday. It's just the best. And I don't have to work! Hey sl*tty teenage girls dressed as sexy kittens, pump your own stomachs this year!

Ann Perkins

There's only one thing I hate more than lying: skim milk. Which is water that is lying about being milk.

Ron Swanson

Dear frozen yogurt, you are the celery of desserts. Be ice cream, or be nothing.

Ron Swanson

Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets.

Ron Swanson

There has never been a sadness that can't be cured by breakfast food.

Ron Swanson

I had to call in a few favors. But if you don't call in favors to look at women in bikinis and assign them numerical grades, what the hell do you call in favors for?

Tom Haverford

I have never taken the high road. But I tell other people to ‘cause then there's more room for me on the low road.

Tom Haverford

I'm like an elephant, okay? If I walk into a room, it's like, okay, he's in there.

Tom Haverford - Season 3 Episode 13

I wasn't listening but I strongly disagree with Ann.

April Ludgate - Season 4 Episode 21

Sometimes you gotta work a little so you can ball a lot.

Tom Haverford - Season 5 Episode 6

Time is money; Money is power; Power is pizza; Pizza is knowledge. Let's go!

April Ludgate - Season 6 Episode 10

She's the worst person I've ever met. I want to travel the world with her.

April Ludgate

We have to remember what's important in life: friends, waffles, and work. Or waffles, friends, work. But work has to come third.

Leslie Knope

I'm gonna get drunk and then I'm gonna order a three-course meal where each course is made of dessert.

Leslie Knope

Everything hurts and I'm dying.

Leslie Knope - Season 4 Episode 17

Idaho cut their parks department by 80 percent. And Idaho is basically one giant park.

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George Bush is not stupid. He's evil. OK? There's a huge difference between stupid and evil.

Patton Oswalt

It's like our country is being run by a bunch of bad alcoholic dads right now.

Patton Oswalt

In Italy, you know you've found a truly authentic restaurant when they don't have an English menu. In India, it's when there are no utensils and you must eat with your hands.

Aziz Ansari

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Italy India Restaurants

Be nice to people and work hard!

Aziz Ansari

Jacob Peralta is my best detective. He likes putting away bad guys and he loves solving puzzles. The only puzzle he hasn't solved is how to grow up.

Terry Jeffords in Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Season 1 Episode 1

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Peralta: "I'm just gonna grab a healthy breakfast."
Holt: "Are those gummybears wrapped in a fruit roll-up?"
Peralta: "Breakfast-Burrito... but, yeah."
Holt: "I pity your dentist."
Peralta: "Joke's on you, I don't have a dentist!"

Jacob Peralta in Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Season 1 Episode 15

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Related pages to Parks and Recreation

Leslie Knope

Ron Swanson

Tom Haverford

April Ludgate

Patton Oswalt

Aziz Ansari

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Ann Perkins