Quote by Oscar Martinez (about Advertising & Marketing)

When I was younger I always wanted to be an actor in commercials, then I realized I had a brain.

Oscar Martinez in The Office - Season 4 Episode 5

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Pam: "Besides, we have something those other people don't have, which is a home and a bed."
Jim: "And a shower."

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If I had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, bin Laden, and Toby - I would shoot Toby twice.

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You need to create the illusion of success for people to pay attention.

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Michael: "You will be thin. You won't drool over pizza like an animal anymore. You will find love."
Kevin: "Michael, I'm pretty much okay with who I am now."
Michael: "Don't be. You should never settle for who you are."

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Holly and I are like Romeo and Juliet. And this office is like the dragon that kept them apart.

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What's the problem? Grunting is scientifically proven to add more power. Ask any female tennis player, or her husband.

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What's the argument here? NBA. WNBA. One is a sport, one is a joke. I love sports, I love jokes. Room for all.

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I'm not going to tell my nine-months-pregnant wife that I find her replacement objectively attractive. Just like I'm not going to tell my two-year-old daughter that violent video games are objectively more fun. It's true, but it doesn't help anybody.

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I am on the first hot sale streak of my life. I think it all comes from feeding CeCe, because no matter how much she resists, I sell her those carrots. Let's be honest - if I can make mushed carrots seem better than a boob... I can pretty much sell anything.

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Jim: "What about and energy drink?"
Pam: "It gets in the breast milk. If I drink it, CeCe drinks it six hours later."
Jim: "It doesn't mean I can't drink it."
Pam: "Well, it does and it doesn't."

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It's not about who you've been with. It's about who you end up with. Sometimes the heart doesn't know what it wants until it finds what it wants.

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Michael: "Phyllis did injure herself, but she injured herself having fun and I don't think she'd trade that memory for anything."
Stanley: "I would like the memory of a day uninterrupted by this nonsense."

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I do not like pregnant women in my workspace. They're always complaining. I have varicose veins too. I have swollen ankles. I'm constantly hungry. You think my nipples don't get sore too?

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Michael: "Excuse me, everyone... Sex! Now that I have your attention...-"
Stanley: "You don't have our attention."
Michael: "Money!"
Stanley: "I'm listening."
Kevin: "You had me at 'Sex'."

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Kevin: "You have a p-nis?"

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I'd rather she be alone than with somebody. Is that love?

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Anybody can be Prince Charming one day a year with the dinner and the flowers and all that. But you know that impresses me? When a guy can do that no days a year.

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This may be the first time that a male subordinate has attempted to get a modest, scheduled raise by threatening to withhold sex from a female superior. It will be a groundbreaking case when it inevitably goes to trial.

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I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've actually left them.

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Jim Halpert's off the market. Guess who just became the best looking single guy in the office.

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What did I say? I talk a lot, so I've learned to just tune myself out.

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I love the American Southwest, for starters. You may call them Arizona, New Mexico, Nevada, Utah. I call them heaven.

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There are plenty of people who love touching me. I'm a terrific hugger. I've been with a bunch of girls where that's basically all they wanna do.

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Florida is America's bas*ment: it's wet, it's filled with mold, strange insects, alligators.

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Quote by Oscar Martinez (about Advertising & Marketing)

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