The best Quotes by Oscar Levant

The best Quotes by Oscar Levant

Oscar Levant (December 27, 1906 - August 14, 1972) was an American concert pianist, composer, conductor, author, radio game show panelist, television talk show host, comedian, and actor.

There are two sides to every question: my side and the wrong side.

1

Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember.

2

Happiness Memories

Schizophrenia beats dining alone.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm schizophrenic, and so am I.

1

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I was just so Pittsburgh. Everything was Pittsburgh for me. I wanted to give my city bragging rights, bring my city something and just give the city another reason to smile.

Damar Hamlin - September 2021

The William Penn Hotel in Pittsburgh... was the place where Champagne Music was born.

Lawrence Welk

1

William Penn Pittsburgh

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

Dean Martin

8

Alcohol Funny Quotes

"There's perfect men around every corner", said God an made the Earth round.

5

Funny Quotes Singles & Dating

Working out makes people more comfortable with their naked bodies. So does Tequila.

3

Funny Quotes Tequila Being naked

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

George Carlin

2

Funny Quotes Santa Claus Bad Girls

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

2

Smoking Funny Quotes

Bacteria is the only culture some people have.

2

Foolishness Culture Funny Quotes

If you're not careful, Netflix & Chill can turn into Disney+ & Children pretty damn fast.

1

Funny Quotes Netflix

Work eight hours and sleep eight hours and make sure that they are not the same hours.

T. Boone Pickens

1

Work Sleeping Funny Quotes

What would I put in a museum? Probably a museum. That's an amusing relic of our past.

John Hodgman

1

Funny Quotes Museums

Wade: "What can I get for $275 and a Yogurtland rewards card?"
Vanessa: "Baby, about 48 minutes of whatever the f*ck you want. And a low-fat dessert."

Vanessa Carlysle in Deadpool

1

I do not like broccoli. And I haven't liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it. And I'm President of the United States and I'm not going to eat any more broccoli.

George H. W. Bush

1

Behind every successful man is a proud wife and a surprised mother-in-law.

Hubert H. Humphrey

1

Weddings Funny Quotes Mothers in law Marriage

There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.

Mary Wilson Little

1

Laziness Funny Quotes Fun

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.

Mitch Hedberg

1

If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?

Jerry Seinfeld

1

When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life.
When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up.
I wrote down "happy". They told me I didn't understand the assignment, and I told them they didn't understand life.

John Lennon

20

That's the best revenge of all: happiness. Nothing drives people crazier than seeing someone have a good f*cking life.

Chuck Palahniuk

14

Happiness Revenge

The happiest people don't worry too much about whether life is fair ot not, they just get on with it.

Andrew Matthews

10

Don't wish me happiness - I don't expect to be happy it's gotten beyond that, somehow. Wish me courage and strength and a sense of humor - I will need them all.

Anne Morrow Lindbergh in Gift from the Sea

8

It was right then that I started thinking about Thomas Jefferson, the Declaration of Independence and the part about our right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. And I remember thinking: How did he know to put the pursuit part in there? That maybe happiness is something that we can only pursue. And maybe we can actually never have it, no matter what. How did he know that?

Chris Gardner in The Pursuit of Happyness

8

Thomas Jefferson Declaration of Independence Happiness Freedom

You think the dead we loved ever truly leave us? You think we don’t recall them more clearly than ever in times of great trouble? Your father is alive in you, Harry, and shows himself plainly when you have need of him.

Albus Dumbledore in Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

28

Memories Death Grief & Condolence

Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment, until it becomes a memory.

Theodor Seuss Geisel

25

Memories Moments

The best moments in life are the ones that make us smile when we think about them.

25

Memories Laughing & Smile

Its so hard to forget someone, who gave you so much to remember.

17

Memories Breakup Forgetting

The truth is, it's all of your memories, the joyful ones and the heartbreaking ones, that make up who you are as a person.

J.D. in Scrubs - Season 6 Episode 11

16

Some a-hole leaks it online and I'm like, you know, looking at the guy in the mirror brushing my teeth, "Dude, what have you done? This could be punishable by law!" But the internet forced the studio to say, "We're gonna make this movie", and 24 hours later, that movie had a green light.

Ryan Reynolds - September 2025

But I don't understand why the Jeffrey Epstein case would be of interest to anybody. It's pretty boring stuff, it's sordid but it's boring and I don't understand why it keeps going.

Donald Trump - July 2025

The Epstein Files

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