The best Quotes by Nick Miller

I´ve decided to give up on women and put all my energy into tomatoes

No, I don´t wash the towel. The towel washes me. Who washes a towl ?

I don´t have a wallet. I have a sandwich bag with my license and money in it.

Where are you, Schmidt ? This place is fancy, and I don´t know which fork to kill myself with.

No! I don´t trust fish. They breathe water, that´s crazy.