The best Quotes by Nick Miller

I´ve decided to give up on women and put all my energy into tomatoes

No, I don´t wash the towel. The towel washes me. Who washes a towl ?

I don´t have a wallet. I have a sandwich bag with my license and money in it.

Where are you, Schmidt ? This place is fancy, and I don´t know which fork to kill myself with.

No! I don´t trust fish. They breathe water, that´s crazy.

Damn it ! I can´t find my driving moccasins anywhere !

I don´t want some janky freshwater b*tch fish.

I´m worried about Schmidt. He´s a Jew in the desert. I don´t want him to wander.

I´m a squirrl. You are my nut. Winter´s coming. I´m gonna store you in my cheek, girl !

Nick, pleace take that off ! You look like a homeless pencil !

I just wanted to listen to Tylor Swift alone

Do not moonwalk away from me

You care about your burritos more than my children, Nick?

Everything you say sounds really creepy when you're not wearing pants.

When you lose everything, that's when you're finally free.