The best Movie Quotes (Page 23)

Try to keep up. I'm a lean, mean, speed machine.

I don't about "practically foolproof". Might be a wee bit optimistic.

To me, being a gangster was better than being president of the United States.

Paulie might have moved slow but it was only because Paulie didn't have to move for anybody.

Is this a tip or a bribe? It's not bad for a tip, but as a bribe, it's absolute horsesh-t.

Mari Carmen: "Why did you pay up front?"
José Luis: "Weddings are always paid up front!"

I promise you this will be the trip of your life.

José Luis: "Help me have as much fun as you do."
Mari Carmen: "You're in for a treat!"

"So I call one of your 6 lines, and then what?"
"You get to hear a tape recording of a woman's voice. And moaning."
"And then I can order her?"
"No, all those men are listening to the same tape. Don't you see? This is big money."
"Crap idea."

Capitalism has won. That does mean we need to earn money, lots of money!

"Thirty callers, 24 hours a day, seven days a week?"
"We are rich!"

If you walk away now, everything will remain the same.

A place where vampires and humans play music together. Eden.

This war will never end, not until everyone loses all reason and turns into monsters! Do you want to live a life worse than death in this place?

Move out! The time has come to avenge our comrades! Destroy that terrible tower of light and kill all the humans!

Scott: "Guys, it's not a good idea to be out in the open like this."
Hank: "Relax, no one's going to recognize us."
Scott: "What, because of hats and sunglasses? That's not a disguise, Hank. We look like ourselves at a baseball game."

Be the hero she already thinks you are.

Spent all these years to find out about the quantum realm and I found out that I know nothing.

Baskin Robbins always finds out. If you want to grab one of those mango fruit blasts on the way out the door, I'll pretend I didn't see it.

Even when the dark comes crashing through
When you need a friend to carry you
And when you're broken on the ground
You will be found

Do you know what my love for you and this credit card have in common? They both have no limit. There's no limit at all.

Love is... you miss them even when they're right there with you, and your heart flutters when you think about them.

There may be some things I don't do, but there's nothing I can't do.

You pretended to be another person. You deliberately wasted someone's precious time for your own benefit. If that's not a scam, what is it?

Nothing good comes out of people knowing you're dating someone at work. If either one of us makes a mistake while working, people will talk behind our backs that we slacked off. If we break up, then they'll talk about whose fault it was behind our backs.

When you eat food that you had in the past, you recall all of the happy memories from back then, and it tastes even better.

It's human to make mistakes sometime. You apologized, so it's fine.

Rather than getting wrinkles from working overtime, isn't going on a blind date with a wealthy guy more productive?

Parents are like that. If you're rich, it's only natural to want a daughter-in-law from a rich family.

So what if he's handsome? He has a rotten personality.

I'm not planning to marry you. How can I marry someone I've only met once?

I want us to start dating with marriage in mind.

True independence is living off the money you earn yourself.

I have loved her even when I hated her... only married couples'll understand that one.

Liz: "Hot guy from the bar who hit on you is here."
Hannah: "Liz, I'm studying."
Liz: "You should be studying the ceiling of his bedroom!"

Jacob: "Are you Steve Jobs?"
Cal: "What?"
Jacob: "Are you the billionaire owner of Apple Computers?"
Cal: "No."
Jacob: "Oh, OK. In that case, you've got no right to wear New Balance sneakers, ever."

I'm going to help you find your manhood. Do you have any idea where you might have lost it?

I will never stop trying. Because when you find the one, you never give up.

Will you take off your shirt...- f-k! Seriously? It's like you're Photoshopped!

The skin under your eyes is starting to look like Hugh Hefner's ball sack.

I don't know whether to help you or euthanize you.

Jacob: "Let's talk about how many women you've been with."
Cal: "Sexually?"
Jacob: "Yeah, no, I mean break-dance fighting."

The war between the sexes is over. We won the second women started doing pole dancing for exercise.

Cal: "How about we say what we want on three? One, two, three."
Emily: "I want a divorce."
Cal: "Crème Brûlée."

I'm wildly unhappy, and I'm trying to buy it, and it's not working.

When I told you when I had to work late? I really went to go see the new Twilight movie by myself, and it was so bad.

Cal: "I was supposed to say that you are the perfect combination of sexy and cute. Which is actually something that I used to say to my wife, but now it's become corrupted and I have eighteen layers of clothes on. I'm wearing a shirt and a tie and a sweater and a suede jacket that just seals in all the heat. Seals in all the juices. I'm just... it's all sweat under here. This is just sweat from here down. I'm... this sweater, this is called slim cut, but it feels like a scuba suite and I'm looking at your breasts. What's that about?"
Kate: "You think I'm the perfect combination of sexy and cute?"
Cal: "That's what you picked up from what I just said?"

You see, the problem is, your head is like the proportions of a styrofoam peanut.

Hannah: "I'm here to bang the hot guy who hit on me at the bar."
Jacob: "Jacob."
Hannah: "Jacob! Sorry, Jacob..."
Jacob: "Do people still say 'bang'?"
Hannah: "I do. And we're gonna bang!"

You're as ready as you're ever gonna be. You play your strengths, Pal. That's all any of us can do. I'm mysterious, I'm, you know, good in bed and you're - you are... you know, a stable employed adult.