The best Quotes by Molly Ivins

The best Quotes by Molly Ivins

Mary Tyler "Molly" Ivins (August 30, 1944 – January 31, 2007) was an American newspaper columnist, author, political commentator, and humorist.

It really is possible to disagree with someone's policies without hating them. Grown-ups can do that.
I dearly love the state of Texas, but I consider that a harmless perversion on my part and discuss it only with consenting adults.
I've always found it easier to be funny than to be serious.
Satire is traditionally the weapon of the powerless against the powerful.
I never saw anything funnier than Texas politics.

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Dante: "[seeing a Confederate flag] What? Are you serious?"
Lila: "Newsflash, we're in deep Texas."
The stars at night, are big and bright,
deep in the heart of Texas,
The prairie sky is wide and high,
deep in the heart of Texas.
1
Of course, nobody I knew in East-Texas in 1989 cared about Newtonian Physics. The only Newtons they cared about were Wayne and Fig.
Sheldon Cooper in Young Sheldon - Season 1 Episode 1
1
When a Texan gets knocked off a horse, he gets right back on. That is the second most important thing about bein' a Texan, right after thinkin' you're better than everybody else.
"Did you grow up in Texas?"
Meemaw: "Took my first bath in a ten-gallon hat."
Sheldon: "Texas, Oklahoma... what's the difference?"
Meemaw: "Hey, now, I think you might want to crack open your psychology textbook 'cause that there is crazy talk."
Amy: "Lino's reinventing Thanksgiving."
Zora: "Oh, good. 'Cause if there's anything Texans love, it's different sh-t."
From Scratch - Season 1
Since you went away
I bet you missed your exit
And drove right on through the Lone Star state
There's a seat for you at the rodeo
And I've got every slow dance saved
Besides the Mexican food sucks north of here anyway
Bowling for Soup - Ohio (Come Back to Texas), Album: A Hangover You Don’t Deserve
In Texas, it's football. In Georgia, football. There's an appreciation from the average person about football more than anywhere else. And we have that for basketball in New York. And we'll always have that in New York.
Lila: "So, Richter, why are you such a nihilist?"
Richter: "A what?"
Lila: "I mean, anyone who blasts diesel into the atmosphere like that, truly gives zero f-s about like anything."
Richter: "I'm a Texan. I don't like people telling me what to do. Especially smug, self-righteous, rich, city folk."
In Texas, we practically come out of the womb in jeans.
Are you really a Texan? I mean, really? If I have a headache, I'd put bacon around an Aspirin before I take it.
RJ Scott
Football is to Texas what religion is to a priest.
Don't mess with Texas!
Texas has long been known as the nation's largest energy producer, but we are equally proud of our distinction as the nation's leading energy innovator.
You may all go to hell, and I will go to Texas.
Texas is a hotbed of insanely good bands and musicians.
When rough times have fallen upon our state in the past, Texans have always responded with generosity and an eagerness to help. The compassionate response to the fires has proven that this community spirit is alive and well.
I felt like the luckiest kid in the world because God had put me on the ground in Texas. I actually felt sorry for those poor little kids that had to be born in Oklahoma or England or some place. I knew I was living in the best place in the world.
California has officially announced that jaywalking is now no longer a crime. So congratulations to the Californians who like walking places. This is great news for the six of you.
Trevor Noah in The Daily Show - October 2022
New Mexico. It's another state. I mean, it's like California, just less traffic.
Lalo Salamanca in Better Call Saul - Season 6 Episode 5
We all have our little faults. Mine's in California.
All creative people should be required to leave California for three months every year.
1
Helsinki may not be as cold as you make it out to be, but California is still a lot nicer. I don't remember the last time I couldn't walk around in shorts all day.
The apparent ease of California life is an illusion, and those who believe the illusion real live here in only the most temporary way.
Things are tough all over, cupcake. An' it rains on the just an' the unjust alike... except in California.
Silk Spectre in Watchmen -
1
I read the Life magazine articles about free love and free dope in California. At age 20 I drove to Los Angeles.
That's the great thing about California, you can almost go to the mountains and almost go to the beach on the same day.
Leonard Hofstadter in The Big Bang Theory - Season 11 Episode 11
2
You know what's remarkable? That England looks in no way like Southern California.
Austin Powers in Austin Powers - The Spy Who Shagged Me
It's the edge of the world
And all of Western civilization
The sun may rise in the east
At least it's settled in a final location
It's understood that Hollywood sells Californication
1
I drank when I was pregnant with you, you turned out fine. There's everybody saying 'don't drink, don't smoke'. I swear - Texas is turning into California.
Men must be free to do what they believe. It is not our right to punish one for thinking what they do, no matter how much we disagree.
6
There are two kinds of fools: those who can't change their opinions and those who won't.
3
All empty souls tend toward extreme opinions.
2
If you can't laugh at yourself, life is going to seem a whole lot longer than you'd like.
3
He who can make people laugh has to be taken seriously; all people with power know that.
3
If you can't make it better, you can laugh at it.
2
Fools who wear their hearts proudly on their sleeves, who cannot control their emotions, who wallow in sad memories and allow themselves to be provoked this easily - weak people, in other words.
2
Take your job seriously, but don't take yourself too seriously.
1
In other words, you don't want to be serious
It takes two to be serious.
1
It's true that none of my characters are admirable. But maybe I'm primarily a satirist, and a satirist needs to hold up what's not admirable.
Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is rather ridiculous, when you think about it.
I'm paranoid. On my stationary bike, I have a rear view mirror.
When you're in love it's the most glorious two and a half days of your life.

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