Quotes by Michael Scott (Page 2)

Toby is in HR, which technically means he works for corporate. So he's really not a part of our family. Also he's divorced, so he's really not a part of his family.

Please do not drink and drive... because you may hit a bump and spill the drink.

I mean, who's gonna give Kevin an award, Dunkin' Donuts?

I live by one rule: "No office romances". No way! Very messy, inappropriate. But I live by another rule: "Just do it" - Nike.

The main difference between me and Donald Trump is that I get no pleasure out of saying the words, "You're fired."

You'll notice I didn't have anybody be Arab. I thought that would be too explosive. No pun intended.

How come Chris Rock can do a routine, and everyone finds it hilarious and groundbreaking. Then I go and do the exact same routine, same comedic timing, and people file a complaint to corporate?

I'm a friend first and a boss second. Probably entertainer third.

This is from corporate. How many times have I told you that there's a special filing cabinet for things from corporate? It's called the wastepaper basket!

Heros of mine would be... Bob Hope. Abraham Lincoln, definitely. Bono. And probably God would be the fourth one. I just think all those people really helped the world in so many ways that it's really beyond words.