The best Quotes by Michael Palin

The human race should just slow down and think about what it is doing.

Contrary to what the politicians and religious leaders would like us to believe, the world won't be made safer by creating barriers between people.

The use of the word "just" by an Australian means that whatever it is you have to do, it will not be easy, as in "Just pull that sword out of the stone" or "Just split that atom."

Once the travel bug bites there is no known antidote, and I know that I shall be happily infected until the end of my life.

The trouble with travelling back later on is that you can never repeat the same experience.

One of the most important days of my life was when I learned to ride a bicycle.

All I ask of food is that it doesn't harm me.

Geography is the subject which holds the key to our future.

I want people to know there is more to Somalia than looting and piracy.

There is barely a country in the world where you will be completely safe.

Carol, I'm sorry we don't have more for you to do, but we're just not very good at writing parts for women.

They all welcomed me with open arms and immediately put my fears to rest. John Cleese was rather flirty; Michael Palin seemed rather shy; Terry Jones was very jolly; Eric Idle was a tiny bit aloof; Graham Chapman was very polite and Terry Gilliam was very loud and a bit manic.

Then there was Michael Palin. Michael is the one who hasn't changed at all. I thought he was - and still is - the cutest of the bunch.

I loved every minute of Python and owe so much to them.

We're all in our 70s now and even doing 10 shows, with lots of costume changes, is going to be exhausting. And the guys have far more to do than me, obviously. But I have a feeling it might not be the last Python project ever. I wouldn't be surprised if they did another film.

As the first series progressed I found it was John Cleese who I got on best with and who made me laugh the most. He was the one who would change the most during the course of Python.

If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?

I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.

I think that money spoils most things, once it becomes the primary motivating force.

The Americans all love 'The Holy Grail', and the English all love 'Life Of Brian', and I'm afraid on this one, I side with the English.

No day of my life passes without someone saying the words "Monty Python" to me. It's not bad.

We've discovered that the less we do, the more money we make.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will make me go in a corner and cry by myself for hours.

The Minister of Transport issued this appeal to motorists: Can anyone give him a lift to Leicester?

What really alarms me about President Bush's "War on Terrorism" is the grammar. How do you wage war on an abstract noun? How is "Terrorism" going to surrender? It's well known, in philological circles, that it's very hard for abstract nouns to surrender.

We will definitely not burn the Koran, no. Not today, not ever.

I've given up asking questions. l merely float on a tsunami of acceptance of anything life throws at me... and marvel stupidly.

Television and the media are everywhere and they are taking over so powerfully. They don't shut up for a second. So you are unable to think.

There are many people in the country today who, through no fault of their own, are sane. Some of them were born sane. Some of them became sane later in their lives.

We don't deliberately set out to offend. Unless we feel it's justified.

Harry, suffering like this proves you are still a man! This pain is part of being human.

As much money and life as you could want! The two things most human beings would choose above all - the trouble is, humans do have a knack of choosing precisely those things that are worst for them.

The landscapes underwater don't know any borders.

The wonderful thing is, imagination is universal all over the world, no matter what the language is.

Australia... home of every animal that seems like it should already be extinct.

In order to get cheap accommodation in Australia, we like foreign people to do manual labour for us. Helping feed the cows is very important, they are the future of McDonald's.

I'm in love with cities I've never been to and people I've never met.

I'm in love with cities I have never been to and with people I have never met.

Traveling is like flirting with life. It's like saying "I would stay and love you, but I have to go".

The world is like a book. Those who don't travel read only one page.

People feel repressed by their own governments; they feel unfairly treated by the outside world; they wake up in the morning, and who do they see - they see people being shot and killed: all Muslims from Afghanistan, Iraq, Somalia, Sudan, Darfur.

Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy a flight to Somalia - and that's practically the same thing.

You know, you come from nothing, you're going back to nothing. What have you lost? Nothing!

Frenchman: "You empty-headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!"
Sir Galahad: "Is there someone else up there we can talk to?"
Frenchman: "No! Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!"

Ah, I see you have the machine that goes "ping!". This is my favourite. You see, we lease this back from the company we sold it to - that way it comes under the monthly current budget and not the capital account.

We find your American beer like making love in a canoe. It's f-ing close to water.

What's brown and sounds like a bell? Dung!