The best Quotes and Captions from MacGyver

Alexander: "You know what I think? I think you're crazy!"
MacGyver: "Give me a few hours, you'll know for sure."

If you let yourself be afraid of dying, you're just going to end up being afraid of living.

"Sind Sie verrückt?"
MacGyver: "Das wird gelegentlich behauptet."

Look. If this works, it'll keep us from getting caught. If it doesn't, it'll keep us from getting old.

There are some places in this world that are a lot easier to get into then out of. Like East Berlin, for instance.

What a beautiful part of the world. It has everything but people.

This road would definitely be an E ride at Disneyland.

You don't go to people with your problems. You come to your friends.

There always seems to be a way to fix things.

I'm about 20 seconds from becoming part of the landscape.

When I was about ten I got my first chemistry set. I've been a beaker and test-tube nut ever since. My mom said I was gonna come up with a formula that would either improve the world... or blow up the house.

When I was a kid, I use to build model airplanes with rubber band motors. Then I discovered batteries - it sure did increase the mileage.

My mom used to make a great broiled chicken. One of my favorites. Funny, I'm starting to feel real sympathetic towards them chickens.

MacGyver: "Pick a number between one and ten, quick!"
Charlie: "Seven."
MacGyver: "Close, but wrong; I go first."

The man who said "Life is like a bowl of cherries" had it wrong. It's a bowl of Hungarian goulash: hot, sticky, and I'm not that hungry.

Yanna: "Why do they hate us?"
MacGyver: "Some people are scared of anyone who runs free."

Herpetologists will tell you everyone has an inner fear of snakes - including herpetologists.

The first time I got to ride on a merry-go-round, I was about six or seven. I'd never seen anything like it. It was a kind of magic. Go to a merry-go-round anywhere in the world and you can see the same look in the kids eyes. It's magic. It's a shame we have to grow up... and lose it.

Pete: "Wird hier auch mal Staub gewischt?"
Mac: "Zwei mal jährlich, pünktlich auf die Minute."

When you think about it, I take on a lot of jobs nobody else would want. The question is, why do I want 'em. I find myself asking these questions more and more and rationalizing answers with stuff like flexible hours, nice scenery, all expense paid vacations in colorful Eastern European luxury resorts. But, the bottom line is, I like it. I actually like getting into stuff that makes the old adrenaline pump. And, I get to meet some interesting people who have made some interesting career choices themselves.

It's a known fact that 80 decibels of rushing water is one of the most pleasing sounds known to mankind. On the other hand, ten and a half days at sea is enough water for anybody.

Disneyland isn't designed just for children. When does a person stop being a child? Can you say that a child is ever entirely eliminated from an adult?

Disneyland will never be completed. It will continue to grow as long as there is imagination left in the world.

I went to a costume party dressed as a chicken and hooked up with a girl dressed as an egg.

Long story short:
The chicken.

Alabamians don't tell you to wait before rushing a decision… they say "don't count your chickens before they hatch."

A snake that crawled on the earth one day dreamed of soaring through the sky, though knowing it was impossible. Still, hoping beyond hope, it kept it's eye on a baby bird which it raised in its own nest, little realizing that actually the snake is prey because that bird is a hawk, ready to take to the sky.

But we're not bad people. We're like our emblem, the snake: sleek, powerful, and frequently misunderstood.

I don't have friends, I have family.

No matter how fast you are, no one outruns their past.

"We have laws for these things."
"Until they fail. Then you have me."

You're telling me one man did this? And the only thing you know is he's a Beekeeper?

You don't have time to think up there. If you think, you're dead.

Gentlemen, you are the elite. The best of the best. We'll make you better!

Of all the threats from both your past and future. You've never faced anything like this.

Do not forget what you have learned of our past, Rodimus. From its lessons, the future is forged.

There's only one rule in the jungle: when the lion's hungry, he eats!

Coach: "His name is Phuc, but spelled with a "ph", so it sounds like f-ok."
Phuc: "Please!"
Coach: "Alright, Phuc, calm the f-ook down."

In 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire the A-Team.

I love it when a plan comes together.

We're not just black, we're cops too. We'll pull ourselves over later.

Mike, you go to therapy to get your issues worked out, not bang your therapist.

Shimazu: "I want you to find your peace. But a good death only comes after a good life."
John Wick: "You and I left a good life behind a long time ago, my friend."

A man has to look his best when it's time to get married... or buried.

Your days of fighting to the so-called greater good are over. This is our chance to control the truth - the concepts of right and wrong - for everyone for centuries to come. You're fighting to save an ideal that doesn't exist. Never did. You need to pick a side.

We'll burn that bridge when we get to it.

I want revenge. I want them to know that death is coming, and there is nothing they can do to stop it.

I've lived in a world of death. I've watched people I've loved die. Some fast with a bullet, some not enough left to bury. All these years I've kept my secrets, but the time has come to face my past. And if it comes looking for me, they will welcome death.

Kami: "What do you want, sweetie?"
Alphie: "For robots to be free."
Kami: "Oh. We don't have that in the fridge. How about ice cream?"

Alphie: "What's heaven?"
Joshua: "It's a peaceful place in the sky."
Alphie: "Are you going to heaven?"
Joshua: "No."
Alphie: "Why not?"
Joshua: "You got to be a good person to go to heaven."
Alphie: "Then we're the same. We can't go to heaven, because you're not good, and I'm not a person."

Supervisor: "Attention, whoever you are, this channel is reserved for emergency calls only."
John McClane: "No f*cking shit, lady! Does it sound like I'm ordering a pizza?"