The best Quotes by King Zøg

The saddest thing in life is havin' to say goodbye to the person you want to spend that life with.

Disenchantment - Season 2 Episode 4

Zøg: "I'd like to tell you something about understandin' women."
Bean: "Yes?"
Zøg: "I said I'd like to, doesn't mean I can."

Disenchantment - Season 2 Episode 4

Leavo: "Stone socks? 'Tis no treasure."
Bean: "I thought the liquid only stonified living things?"
Zøg: "You don't know my socks."

Disenchantment - Season 2 Episode 2

Socks

Queen Dagmar: "Sounds to me like he deserves a marvelous funeral."
King Zøg: "Great idea. I'll get someone to fish him out of the corpse pit."

Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 10

Bean: "I just realized something. You're the reason I have a drinking problem."
Zøg: "Of course I am. I'm your father."

Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 9

Alcohol

Lying to me in any other way than flattery is a mortal crime.

Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 9

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Whoa, this is big. I really need some time to drink about this.

Princess Bean in Disenchantment - Season 3 Episode 4

Man, after-work drinks taste so much better than instead-of-work drinks.

Princess Bean in Disenchantment - Season 3 Episode 4

Elfo: "What about me? Nobody cared either time I came back to life."
Luci: "I was disappointed both times. Disappointment's a form of caring."

Luci in Disenchantment - Season 3 Episode 3

Heavy is the head that wears the crown.

Prince Derek in Disenchantment - Season 3 Episode 3

Power Kings

I always wanted to get lost in a labyrinth. It's like a puzzle you solve with your feet.

Elfo in Disenchantment - Season 3 Episode 2

Feet

Oh my gosh, it's exactly like my bedroom from when I was little! What are these frilly dresses doing in my liquor cabinet?

Princess Bean in Disenchantment - Season 3 Episode 1

By order of the king, me, Derek, I, we do declare Dreamland is now a theocracy. All power emanates from this holy throne and the ass therein ensconced.

Prince Derek in Disenchantment - Season 3 Episode 1

You know, if there's one thing I've learned, it's when you're stuck in a cave with your psycho mum, the best thing to do is play along.

Luci in Disenchantment - Season 3 Episode 1

This loon thought the world was round. This nut married a duck. This vision of beauty tried to drown her grandchildren. Luckily, they were all ducks.

Jerry in Disenchantment - Season 2 Episode 1

Ducks

I'm just about at the end of my 24-hour shift. There it is. Well, back to work.

Jerry in Disenchantment - Season 2 Episode 1

Bean: "Wow, that's the best soup I ever had!"
Dagmar: "It's Whiskey."

Princess Bean in Disenchantment - Season 2 Episode 1

Whiskey

I only got in trouble once, and... um.. Daddy Elfo um... slapped me on the bum bum.

Elfo in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 3

Maybe that's why I've had such low elf-esteem.

Elfo in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 9

Oh, floor, you're always there for me. So supportive. Not like walls and staircases, always getting in my way.

Princess Bean in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 6

Luci: "I can't believe he called you a worthless, bucktoothed degenerate."
Bean: "He didn't say that."
Luci: "Doesn't make it any less true."

Luci in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 5

Maybe reality is the dream and dreams are reality. You ever think about that?

Luci in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 4

It's a lemon, guys. It's what we feed children in hell.

Luci in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 3

Hölle Zitronen

Some might say her cries for help were a cry for help, but I think she was just being an attention hog.

Luci in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 3

Lady Lingonberry: "I'm drowning!"
Elfo: "I'm Elfo!"

Elfo in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 3

Bean: "I'm gonna have to kill him or something."
Luci: "Do it! Do it! Do it! And after you kill him we can hide the body. Then we could join the search party and you and I can look at each other and try not to laugh."

Luci in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 2

Your cruddy life is worth living, Bean. And so is mine... if you live.

Elfo in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 2

Destiny is baloney. Your future is not foretold. It's what you make of it.

Elfo in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 1

Bean: "What's this weird feeling I don't want to drink away?"
Elfo: "That's hope. That's hope!"
Luci: "You know what we say in hell? 'Hope's for dopes.'"

Luci in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 1

Bean: "You two sleep down at my feet. I call it the friend zone."
Luci: "Get comfortable. You ain't never getting outta here."

Luci in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 1

Hey, he's making fun of my dreams. That's what friends do.

Elfo in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 1

I'd rather die a big death than live a small life.

Elfo in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 1

Life

I wanna taste something other than sweetness. I wanna cry salty tears, learn bitter truths. I wanna take a big, meaty bite out of life and dip it in mustard.

Elfo in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 1

All this wedding hassle for a stupid political alliance? I thought that I'd get married for true love, or because I was wasted.

Princess Bean in Disenchantment - Season 1 Episode 1

One can never have enough socks. Another Christmas has come and gone and I didn't get a single pair. People will insist on giving me books.

Albus Dumbledore in Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

Socks

Socks are Dobby's favourite, favourite clothes, sir!

Dobby in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

Socks

To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems!

Homer Simpson in The Simpsons - Season 8 Episode 18

Alcohol Toasts

Everything's better with some wine in the belly.

Tyrion Lannister in Game of Thrones - Season 1 Episode 2

Alcohol Wine

If you start deporting every shady looking guy with questionable tattoos, who's gonna go to Jets games?

Jordan Klepper in The Daily Show

New York Jets

The best Quotes by King Zøg

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