The best Quotes by Joss Whedon

I always was an early-morning or late-night writer. Early morning was my favorite; late night was because you had a deadline. And at four in the morning, you make up some of your most absurd jokes.

The thing about a hero, is even when it doesn't look like there's a light at the end of the tunnel, he's going to keep digging, he's going to keep trying to do right and make up for what's gone before, just because that's who he is.

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How dare you open a spaceman's helmet on an uncharted planet! My eyeballs could've been sucked from their sockets!

Lightyear in Toy Story

Come on. Let’s see how much we’re going for on eBay.

Hamm in Toy Story

eBay

Buzz Lightyear: "Excuse me, I think the word you're searching for is 'Space Ranger'."
Woody: "The word I'm searching for I can't say, because there's preschool toys present."

Woody in Toy Story

We’re not preschool toys, Slinky. We can read.

Mr. Potato Head in Toy Story

Your'e right, Prospector. I can't stop Andy from growing up... but I wouldn't miss it for the world.

Woody in Toy Story

Rex: "No, no, no, no."
Buzz Lightyear: "Oh, you almost had him."
Rex: "I'm never gonna defeat Zurg!"
Buzz Lightyear: "Sure, you will, Rex. In fact, you're a better Buzz than I am."
Rex: "But look at my little arms! I can't press the 'fire' button and 'jump' at the same time!"

Toy Story

Woody once risked his life to save mine, and I couldn't call myself his friend if I wasn't willing to do the same.

Lightyear in Toy Story

Loki: "I have an army."
Iron Man: "We have a Hulk!"

Iron Man in The Avengers

Hulk

Captain America: "Big man in a suit-armor. Take that away, what are you?"
Iron Man: "A genius billionaire playboy philanthropist..."

Iron Man in The Avengers

No amount of money ever bought a second of time.

Iron Man in The Avengers - Endgame

Money Time

Thor: "Have care how u speak! Loki is beyond reason, but he's from Asgard and he's my brother."
Black Widow: "He killed 80 people in 2 days."
Thor: "He's adopted..."

Thor in The Avengers

Iron Man: "Still, you are pretty spry, for an older fellow. What's your thing, Pilates?"
Captain America: "What?"
Iron Man: "It's like calisthenics. You might have missed a couple things, you know, doing time as a Capsicle."

Iron Man in The Avengers

I recognise the council has made a decision, but given that it's a stupid-ass decision, I've elected to ignore it.

Nick Fury in The Avengers

In a few hours, I'll know every dirty secret S.H.I.E.L.D. has ever tried to hide... Blueberry?

Iron Man in The Avengers

Dawn: "So what are you supposed to be?"
Anya: "An angel."
Dawn: "Oh, shouldn't you have wings?"
Anya: "Um, no, this is a special kind of angel called a Charlie. We don't have wings, we just skate around with perfect hair fighting crime."

Anya Jenkins in Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Season 6 Episode 6

Charlie's Angels

I've gotta say something, 'cause I don't think I've made it clear. I'm in love with you. Powerfully, painfully in love. The things you do, the way you think, the way you move. I get excited every time I'm about to see you. You make me feel like I've never felt before in my life... like a man. I just thought you might like to know.

Xander in Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Season 5 Episode 10

Love declerations Anya Jenkins

Giles: "Cordelia, have you actually ever heard of tact?"
Cordelia: "Tact is just not saying true stuff. I'll pass."

Cordelia Chase in Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Season 2 Episode 18

Buffy: "Sorry to say, Xand, slaying is a tad more perilous than dating."
Xander: "Well, you're obviously not dating Cordelia."

Xander in Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Season 2 Episode 16

Cordelia Chase

Look, Buffy, you may be hot stuff when it comes to demonology or whatever, but when it comes to dating, I'm the Slayer.

Cordelia Chase in Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Season 2 Episode 6

I'm just saying when tragedy strikes, we have to look on the bright side. You know? Like how even used Mercedes still have leather seats.

Cordelia Chase in Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Season 1 Episode 3

Mercedes-Benz

Giles: "Why should someone want to harm Cordelia?"
Willow: "Maybe because they met her? Did I say that?"

Willow Rosenberg in Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Season 1 Episode 3

Cordelia Chase

Mack: "There shouldn't be any secrets between us."
Yo-Yo: "Why not? There's nothing else between us."

Slingshot in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. - Season 4 Episode 3

The strangest thing I've ever heard. Except for the sexy robot that you made that became human and wanted you to stick the old floppy into her love drive.

Lance Hunter in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. - Season 5 Episode 5

Coulson: "Have you seen Skye?"
Ward: "Not since weapons training."
Coulson: "She stop saying 'bang' when she pulls the trigger?"
Ward: "Mostly. Now if she can just learn the difference between the safety release and the magazine release, we will be making real progress."

Grant Ward in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. - Season 1 Episode 4

We have to live with the choices we make, but sometimes we have to die with them, too.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. - Season 1 Episode 3

With great power comes… a ton of weird crap that you are not prepared to deal with.

Daisy Johnson in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. - Season 1 Episode 1

Spider-Man

Hill: "What does S.H.I.E.L.D. stand for, Agent Ward?"
Ward: "Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics Division."
Hill: "And what does that mean to you?"
Ward: "It means someone really wanted our initials to spell out 'shield'."

Grant Ward in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. - Season 1 Episode 1

Werner Reinhardt: "Cut off one head, two more shall grow in its place."
Peggy Carter: "Then I guess we'll keep cutting them off."

Peggy Carter in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. - Season 2 Episode 1

Only a blind man measures the length of a blade by how much is in his belly.

Lord Massen in The Nevers

Penance Adair: "I'm not confident in my curtsying."
Amalia True: "I'm not confident in my breathing."
Penance Adair: "Oh, I wasn't planning to breathe. I think it's considered rude."

Penance Adair in The Nevers

Lucy Best: "My mum used to say, if you can look a man in the eye, you can stab him in it."
Amalia True: "Smart woman."

Amalia True in The Nevers

Penance Adair: "Mrs. True."
Amalia True: "Miss Adair."
Penance Adair: "You look very fine."
Amalia True: "I think so too."

Amalia True in The Nevers

Prince Albrecht: "It's just a woman."
Lord Broughton: "Five men murdered. I'd say she's more than that."

The Nevers

Murder

We have enemies we don't know about yet.

Amalia True in The Nevers

She does speak English. But not with her mouth.

Penance Adair in The Nevers

You know the thing about good food? It brings folks together from all walks of life.

James in The Princess and the Frog

Food

If you read my blog, you know I'm a pilates freak. And by pilates, I mean waffles.

Zach Galifianakis

Dessert

I just want you to know that even though you tried to terminate me, revenge is not an idea we promote on my planet.

Lightyear in Toy Story

Perfectly balanced as all things should be.

Thanos in The Avengers - Infinity War

"That's all you got? Cheap trick and a cheesy one-liner?"
"Sweetheart, that could be the name of my autobiography."

Tony Stark in Iron Man

At some point we all have to choose. Between what the world wants you to be and who you are.

Black Widow

You break the rules and become a hero. I do it, I become the enemy... that doesn't seem fair.

Wanda Maximoff in Doctor Strange - in the Multiverse of Madness

I have been a voice with no body. A body, but not human. And now, a memory made real. Who knows what I might be next?

Vision in WandaVision - Season 1 Episode 9

The only ones who gods care about is themselves.

Gorr in Thor - 4: Love and Thunder

Thor: "We are just like the humans. We are born, we live, we die."
Loki: "Give or take 5,000 years."

Loki in Thor - 2: The Dark World

The best Quotes by Joss Whedon

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