20 hilarious Quotes by Joe Buck

Lamar Jackson opening up, like Moses parting the Red Sea.

Troy Aikman: "That's a lot of jet fuel, just to do a little flyover."
Joe Buck: "That's your hard-earned money and your tax dollars at work."

Welcome to the broadcast booth, everybody, I'm Joe Buck along with a couple of guys that I like to call my friends... on Sundays. Troy Aikman and Cris Collinsworth.

It is a cool evening in the desert, but we're getting ready to heat it up. It's the New England Patriots and the Arizona Caridnals for you on a Monday night.

There is the Red Rifle, got that beard all tucked into that chin strap, ready to go.

The worst thing in the world is to feel like people turn on the TV and say, oh god, it's that guy again. I'm trying to avoid that.

I think by its very nature, it's redundant, you know, being the play-by-play guy on television.

And Johnny Manziel is only in a snickers commercial.

You have to make that stand out from the rest of the three hours. There are times when I'm having fun and being loose, and there are times when I'm ultra serious - calling the Giants/Patriots in the Super Bowl is a lot different than calling the Giants/Cubs game last Saturday. There are different levels of intensity, and I try to respect that when I'm doing it.

If you're the play-by-play announcer, I think it's your job to be better than just saying what's on people's TV screen.

I actually called a touchdown on national TV in the NFL while going to the bathroom.

I'd ask him for another half hour. And then I'd probably start with the obvious and see how honest he would get. I just think those guys are so protected, that you're not going to get much out of them.

Every time you see kid and hear kid, you think, man, I have to not sound like a kid.

But I tell people all the time that if you can do the job, then there's a spot for you. I refuse to believe that there isn't any room in this business. People leave jobs and jobs open up every year. If you can do the job, you'll find your way into the broadcast booth.

We all fell in love with the young Macaulay Culkin, back in the day.

You know what you gotta do, cowboy?

You need to have a great, strong bladder to call professional sports because, especially in football where, you know, you don't know how long a half's going to last and then the timeouts happen and a incomplete pass.

I was always a "grass is greener" kind of guy.

When I visited KU, I thought, "I wish I'd gone to Kansas." They would take me around to their spots, and my spots at Indiana just felt like old hangouts. It was one of those times where you always wished you were somewhere else. But I was happy I ended up at Indiana coming from small little St. Louis.

It's kind of my intention to be myself on the show. My main priority on FOX is to do play-by-play. Nobody's tuning in to listen to me. If I didn't show up to do the games, people would watch, and the ratings probably wouldn't be all that different. That's not why people are watching.

I think when you do radio there's a certain amount of freedom that when you walk in and sit down and turn the mic on, it's you. It's all you.

Anytime you go digging around on the internet and into your world, maybe you don't want to find out where your name pops up.

I think I enjoy my job more now than I did when I started. When I started in 1996 on a national level, I was 27 and part of me was scared to death.

I'm the luckiest guy in the world to be my parents' son.

No fat batboy is invisible.

If you're prepared, you can be relaxed.

We're not all robots. There are emotions that creep in.

You have to do well on third downs.

Losing doesn't eat at me the way it used to. I just get ready for the next play, the next game, the next season.

Just remember that nothing is as bad as it seems and nothing is as good as it sometimes appears.

We go in with eyes wide open and recognize there will be a lot of hard work involved. But we anticipate having success. We feel like we have assembled a great group of people. If we were going to do it any other way, we would have made an announcement a long time ago. We were very diligent.

12 of the best years of my life - It will never be forgotten.

I've always viewed myself as an achiever. I need to achieve for myself.

I know how difficult my rookie year in the NFL was and I know how competitive this sport is.

No excuse for those mechanical errors to be happening.

I never stop looking for things to try and make myself better.

But to be the best, you must face the best. And to overcome your fear, you must deal with the best.

We got so many guys, great receivers and great tight ends and great running backs. Everyone can't shine at once, you know, it's everyone going to shine all together.

Boy, I don't give a damn about your parlay or fantasies, I'm trying to win.

Get your calculators out, this will be fun!

Most of the really stupid comments I've made in my years in Cincinnati are concerning bachelorhood.

You always want to end the year on a high note.

The quarterback is the leader of the team and the quarterback is the one that has the ball in his hands every single play.

I could have gone the route of a lot of these former child actors, but I didn't want that for myself. Like I said, when I was 14 years old, I decided to quit. I didn't ever want to do it again.

I enjoy my life. I think I have a very good life. And I think I'm very satisfied with the direction of my career and just my lifestyle and everything like that. So I wouldn't change a single thing.

About the only problem with success is that it does not teach you how to deal with failure.

I didn't play the game right because I saw a reward at the end of the tunnel.

You win a championship, and you feel 7 feet tall.

I'm a winner, I play to win, I want to make good things go on around me.