The best Quotes by Jeremy Paxman

The early bird may get the worm, but its the second mouse that gets the cheese.

It's very difficult to remain calm when you're listening to someone talk complete bollocks.

I find it odd that people take me seriously.

You can't start over with a new life, but every morning you can start over with a new day.

No matter how dark the night, morning always comes, and our journey begins anew.

What irritates me most of all about these morning people is their horribly good temper, as if they have been up for three hours and already conquered France.

Sometimes you climb out of bed in the morning and you think, I'm not going to make it, but you laugh inside - remembering all the times you've felt that way.

Some people dream of success, while other people get up every morning and make it happen.

A successful day starts from the morning. Let's give it our all today.

Every winter contains a quivering spring and behind the curtain of every night there's a smilling morning.

Mornings are not so cool, I see myself in the mirror and I look like an accordion!

I have always been delighted at the prospect of a new day, a fresh try, one more start, with perhaps a bit of magic waiting somewhere behind the morning.

Good morning is a contradiction of terms.

The early bird gets the worm. The early worm... gets eaten.

I love the sunrise, as I am definitely a morning person! It's a great time to get up and have a coffee in the garden by myself before everybody wakes up.

An early-morning walk is a blessing for the whole day.

Your morning sets up the success of your day. So many people wake up and immediately check text messages, emails, and social media. I use my first hour awake for my morning routine of breakfast and meditation to prepare myself.

Instead of waking up every day saying, 'Poor me,' how about you get up and thank God you can get up!

Smile in the mirror. Do that every morning and you'll start to see a big difference in your life.

Think in the morning. Act in the noon. Eat in the evening. Sleep in the night.

We've discussed this, mornings are for coffee and contemplation.

What's the first thing I do when I wake up in the morning? Wish I hadn't.

There comes a time, brothers, where history is forged like melted cheese. It sticks together as one, but it's still soft and squishy in the middle.

Age doesn't really matter... unless you're a cheese.

How can anyone govern a nation that has two hundred and forty-six different kinds of cheese?

Once we hit forty, women only have about four taste buds left: one for vodka, one for wine, one for cheese, and one for chocolate.

Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.

Only peril can bring the French together. One can't impose unity out of the blue on a country that has 265 kinds of cheese.

One candidate is too old and mentally unfit to be president. The other one is me.

What do you call an Asian Dwayne Johnson?
The Wok.

I'm paranoid. On my stationary bike, I have a rear view mirror.

When you're in love it's the most glorious two and a half days of your life.

I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back.

I tried phone sex - it gave me an ear infection.

During sex I fantasize that I'm someone else.

I like to read biographies of authors that I love, like Richard Yates. I also like to see what non-fiction authors are out there. My bible is Something Happened. It's one of the greatest books I've ever read. But if I don't read a Dostoevsky soon I'm going to kill myself.

For 45 years I've worked without an audience.