The best Quotes by Dave Attell

The best Quotes by Dave Attell

David Attell (born January 18, 1965) is an American stand-up comedian, actor and writer best known as the host of Comedy Central's Insomniac with Dave Attell, which earned him a cult following. His work has drawn admiration from many comedians.

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin.
I don't think I'm a star or a celebrity or any thing like that.
Doesn't matter what you say or do; people can always find a way to call you a dick.
Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people 'the cops.' But you know, sometimes, you've just got no choice; those kids gotta get to school!
You know, men and women are a lot alike in certain situations. Like when they're both on fire - they're exactly alike.

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We're like the penguins. We can't fly, but maybe we can learn to swim.
Georgia Miller in Ginny & Georgia - Season 1 Episode 9
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One candidate is too old and mentally unfit to be president. The other one is me.
Joe Biden - März 2024
What do you call an Asian Dwayne Johnson?
The Wok.
I'm paranoid. On my stationary bike, I have a rear view mirror.
When you're in love it's the most glorious two and a half days of your life.
I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back.
I tried phone sex - it gave me an ear infection.
During sex I fantasize that I'm someone else.
I like to read biographies of authors that I love, like Richard Yates. I also like to see what non-fiction authors are out there. My bible is Something Happened. It's one of the greatest books I've ever read. But if I don't read a Dostoevsky soon I'm going to kill myself.
For 45 years I've worked without an audience.
I love being famous. It validates that I have something to say.
My parents were my worst audience.
I think a night like tonight shows a lot of young girls and young boys that if you can shoot you can shoot. It doesn't matter if you're a girl or a boy, I think it just matters the heart that you have and wanting to be the best that you can be.
Sabrina Ionescu - February 2024
I'm looking to do everything that I possibly can to get better in every aspect, whether that's scoring, defending, rebounding, passing, i'm really just excited to be playing against professionals and learning from them and just seeing where that takes me.
Sky is the limit for her and what she can do on the court, in terms of her impact in the game but also the court as well... It's been fun to watch her journey.
Stephen Curry - February 2024
I grew up watching Kobe Bryant game after game, ring after ring, living his greatness without apology.
Sabrina Ionescu - February 2020

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