The best Quotes by PewDiePie

I decided I don't wanna accept more donations. Like if someone gave me money on the street I'll be like, "WTF? No, I'm not gonna take that."

Bobs or vegana, whichever will it be?
Sit the f*ck down, T-Series, I'm here to spill the real tea
You tryna dethrone me from spot on number one
But you India, you lose, so best think you haven't won
When I'm through with you, we're gonna be completely f*ckin' done
'Cause we only just begun
I review you, [clap, clap] zero, bye b*tch, gone

You have to be honest, you can't love someone out of sympathy.

Face your problems! Unless your problem is your face.

The thing that has made YouTube so successful is that you can relate to the people you're watching to a much higher degree than to the people you see on TV.

My parents said that sitting at home playing video games all day won't bring you anywhere in life.

I'm kind of like PewDiePie without the Nazi stuff.

Wherever we go, we promised we're in this together.

Is a male asshole tighter than a female asshole?

Hi! I have been dying to meet you. Oh, God, you're so pretty. You want a White Claw? It's 10:01 somewhere.

Do you like Jordan? Do you want to hang out with them? Do you want to talk to them? Do you want to put your mouth on their mouth and other f*cking body parts? I mean, come on. This isn't quantum physics.

You know when Golden Boy flames on his clothes burn off? It's like a big, fiery sea cucumber.

Being a hero is not about glory. It's about sacrifice.

In darkness, stars can truly shine.

You work with dangerous animals all day, sooner or later, you're gonna get bitten.

You didn't know Luke. How funny he was, how much he loved his family. But shades of gray don't sell like black and white, do they?

I'm Cate's imaginary friend from when she was a kid. Boyfriend, really. I taught her how to jerk off. Diddle that skittle. Flick the bean. Gotta find that man in the canoe. Came like a faucet. She'd crank up the Jonas Brothers. She'd hump a soldier boy pillow. She'd raw dog that pillow till she saw God.

Jordan: "Next time, I won't rescue you."
Marie: "You didn't."
Jordan: "F*cking did."
Marie: "I exploded his dick."
Jordan: "Because I distracted him. Tag team cocksplosion."

I think the Internet has developed at this incredibly rapid pace because of net neutrality, because of the free nature of it, because a YouTube can start the way YouTube started.

Back in the day, if you were watching a video online and words came up on the screen saying, "just wait for it", it was worth waiting for. Something awesome was gonna happen at the end of that video. Now, every second video says, "just wait for it", you get to the end... it's shit. It's underwhelming. Nothing happens. It was not worth waiting for.

I want to make YouTube videos until the day I die, I love this so much.

You all act like you're made of steel. But you're not. No one is.

Welcome to Godolkin University. We've trained the best and brightest young heroes since 1965. Godolkin is a safe space for you to thrive.

It's not about the talent. It's about the drive.

Sometimes people don't have an angle. Sometimes, they're just actual human beings.

I'm the last person who thinks they're a hero. I f*cking hate myself half the time.

I'm just... The kid addicted to their PlayStation. Who goes to Olive Garden just for the breadsticks, who binges Property Brothers. I've never changed, Dad. I've always just been me.

Piece of dickless shit.

How you feel? 'Cause I'm sweating cocaine.

I know more about Supes than just about any soul alive.

You're gonna take a little jog over to Dick's Sporting Goods. Buy yourself a nice Louisville slugger. Bring it right back to the quad and swing that bat as hard as you can into your nuts. Every hour, on the hour. And every time you swing, yell "Jumanji." Sound good?

Hughie, these women they're like fine wine, the older they get, the more delicious, but the drier.

You wanna know what I do when I'm sad… or scared? F*cking nothing. Cuz I'm not a f*cking p*ssy.

Being a hero is not what you think. You know, if you're gonna do this, make sure you do it for you.

One candidate is too old and mentally unfit to be president. The other one is me.