Quotes by Hank Schrader

I wouldn't trust these two to break into the Special Olympics.

Well, sometimes forbidden fruit tastes the sweetest, doesn't it?

Damn. Chick's got an ass like an onion - makes me wanna cry.

Look, a guy doesn't gotta look like, you know, Charlton Heston - I'm talking Moses days - to get a girl, all right? You just gotta have confidence.

Walter Jr.: "Hey, I want a beer."
Hank: "Yeah, I want Shania Twain to give me a tuggy. Guess what. It ain't happening either."

Don't think so hard, it's gonna hurt your brain!

Take it from me, buddy: It's darkest just before the dawn.

Cop: "Anything you want us to tell Steve Gomez? Says he's worried about you."
Hank: "Yeah. Tell him I already got two grandmas."

It's nothing personal Walt, but you wouldn’t know a criminal if he was close enough to check you for a hernia.

Our snitch's car, turns out we find two grams of meth in it. We take it to the lab, they come back they tell us it is the purest they've ever seen. Our chemist is blown away. Said he couldn't do better.