The best Quotes by Gomez Addams

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Amanda: "I'll buy a cup if you buy a box of my delicious Girl Scout cookies."
Wednesday: "Are they made from real Girl Scouts?"

Wednesday Addams in The Addams Family

Gomez: "He has my father's eyes."
Morticia: "Gomez, take those out of his mouth."

Morticia Addams in The Addams Family - Addams Family Values

Morticia: "Wednesday's at that very special age when a girl has only one thing on her mind."
Grandmother: "Boys?"
Wednesday: "Homocide."

Wednesday Addams in The Addams Family - Addams Family Values

Wednesday: "Pass the salt."
Morticia: "And what do we say?"
Wednesday: "Now!"

Wednesday Addams in The Addams Family

Don't torture yourself, Gomez - that's my job.

Morticia Addams in The Addams Family

Living under this roof is all the torment you'll need. Besides, our parents have made it clear that the only way to be accepted in this family is to be exactly like them. I can't play by those rules anymore.

Wednesday Addams in The Addams Family

Morticia: "How was school?"
Pugsley: "Terrible. Especially history."
Wednesday: "Yeah, they never tell us anything interesting. Like, how many heads they chopped off in the French Revolution."

Wednesday Addams in The Addams Family

Gomez: "Children, why do you hate the baby?"
Pugsley: "We don't hate him. We just want to play with him."
Wednesday: "Especially his head."

Wednesday Addams in The Addams Family - Addams Family Values

It's getting dark in this little heart of mine.

Wednesday Addams in The Addams Family

"Where is that baby?"
"Which part?"

Wednesday Addams in The Addams Family

Dear mother and father,

I hate you.

Love, Wednesday

Wednesday Addams in The Addams Family

You have taken the land which is rightfully ours. Years from now my people will be forced to live in mobile homes on reservations. Your people will wear cardigans, and drink highballs. We will sell our bracelets by the road sides. You will play golf and enjoy hot hors d'oeuvres. My people will have pain and degradation. Your people will have stick shifts. The gods of my tribe have spoken. They have said, "Do not trust the Pilgrims. Especially Sarah Miller." And for all these reasons I have decided to scalp you and burn your village to the ground!

Wednesday Addams in The Addams Family

Native American

Weems: "No doubt you'll find something that tickles your fancy."
Wednesday: "The last person who tickled me lost a finger."

Wednesday Addams in Wednesday - Season 1 Episode 2

Dead people are notoriously bad at returning calls.

Wednesday Addams in Wednesday - Season 1 Episode 2

This story is about to take a dark turn. Usually, I love dark turns. Like when the carousel brakes myteriously failed at my eighth birthdays party.

Wednesday Addams in Wednesday - Season 1 Episode 2

Never bring a knife to a sword fight. Unless it's concealed.

Wednesday Addams in Wednesday - Season 1 Episode 1

Weapons Knifes

I find Social Media to be a soul-sucking void of meaningless affirmation.

Wednesday Addams in Wednesday - Season 1 Episode 1

Social Media

Morticia: "That boy's family was going to file attempted murder charges. How would that have looked on your record?"
Wednesday: "Terrible. Everyone would know I failed to get the job done."

Wednesday Addams in Wednesday - Season 1 Episode 1

I'm not sure whose twisted idea it was to put hundreds of adolescents in underfunded schools run by people whose dreams were crushed years ago... but I admire the sadism.

Wednesday Addams in Wednesday - Season 1 Episode 1

School High School

Finally, you will be among pears who understand you. Maybe you'll even make some friends.

Morticia Addams in Wednesday - Season 1

If you start deporting every shady looking guy with questionable tattoos, who's gonna go to Jets games?

Jordan Klepper in The Daily Show

New York Jets

One downside of our big brains is we're the only creatures who are aware that death is inevitable. Although, if you lined ten dogs in a row and shot them one by one, the dog on the end would probably get the gist by about dog four.

Philomena Cunk in Cunk On Life - Episode 1

Brain

Cells couldn't multiply without this, the IKEA instruction manual for life, DNA. DNA is tiny yet comlex, like Tom Cruise.

Philomena Cunk in Cunk On Life - Episode 1

Tom Cruise

Knowledge is a paradox. The more one understands, the more one realizes the vastness of his ignorance.

Viktor, the Machine Herald in Arcane - Season 2 Episode 6

Knowledge

The best Quotes by Gomez Addams

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