Quotes by Georgia Miller

You just called Britney Spears retro, so I have to go cryogenically freeze myself.

I'd do anything to protect my kids like no one ever protected me. Anything.

We're like the penguins. We can't fly, but maybe we can learn to swim.

Life won't throw you parties. You gotta make your own!

Men are visual creatures, so give them something to look at.

Love is a lot of things, Maxine. Safe isn't one of them.

For a woman, life is a battle. And beauty is a goddamn machine gun.

If I could skin you and wear your prepubescent face, I would.

It's about the fact that aging is a horrible, inevitable death sentence where your body betrays you slowly 'til you die.

Ginny: "Don't flirt with the students or other parents. And, please, don't hotbox a classroom."
Georgia: "I only did that once."

Momma's dating life is like that desert - nothing in sight as far as the eye can see.

Why are you smiling like you're about to tell Pinky the plan is to take over the world?

Fantasies are for people with 401 ks. You gotta keep your feet on the hard ground and your head outta your ass!

In case you haven't noticed: I'm 30 and single with two kids from two different guys. Does that look like the ideal, picture-perfect picket fence to you?

You're so responsible. Sometimes I can't believe you cam out of me.

There are two things you can get from sex with a man: passion or power. But you better make sure you're getting something. Otherwise you're just getting screwed.

If they can see where your makeup ends and your face begins, you've done it wrong.

Looks like the apple doesn't fall far from the rotten tree.

You win more flies with honey, but if you get yourself a bee, sting first!

We're like The Gilmore Girls but with bigger boobs.

Georgia: "I get it. I have a teenager."
Ellen Baker: "What? No way. What, did you give birth when you were 12?"
Georgia: "15."

You're gonna like Massachusetts. It's very patriotic - perfect for a fresh start.

Ellen: "It's just gonna be lobster and lobster rolls and clam chowder and mussels."
Georgia: "I'm getting that shellfish is a large part of being in Maine."