The best Quotes by George Costanza

The best Quotes by George Costanza

George Louis Costanza is a fictional character in the American television sitcom Seinfeld (1989–1998), played by Jason Alexander.

Why is nice bad? What kind of a sick society are we living in when nice is bad?
I spend so much time trying to get their clothes off, I never thought of taking mine off.
Borrowing money from a friend is like having sex. It just completely changes the relationship.
This woman hates me so much, I’m starting to like her.
I have a bad feeling that whenever a lesbian looks at me they think 'That’s why I’m not a heterosexual.'

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George: "She calls me up at my office. She says, 'We have to talk.'"
Jerry: "Ugh. The four worst words in the English language."
George: "That or 'Whose bra is this?'"
Jerry: "That's worse."
Breaking up is like knocking over a Coke machine. You can't do it in one push; you gotta rock it back and forth a few times and then it goes over.
Women don't respect salad eaters.
George: "Why do they make the condom packets so hard to open?"
Jerry: "Probably to give the woman a chance to change her mind."
Mr. Peterman: "Elaine, can you keep a secret?"
Elaine: "No sir, I can't."
George: "You're gonna over-dry your laundry."
Jerry: "You can't over-dry."
George: "Why not?"
Jerry: "Same reason you can't over-wet."
Jerome Seinfeld in Seinfeld - Season 1 Episode 1
George: "You've got to apologize."
Jerry: "Why?"
George: "Because it's the mature and adult thing to do."
Jerry: "How does that affect me?"
I’m not a lesbian. I hate men, but I’m not a lesbian.
That’s the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me.
As much money and life as you could want! The two things most human beings would choose above all - the trouble is, humans do have a knack of choosing precisely those things that are worst for them.
20
If you lose money you lose much,
If you lose friends you lose more,
If you lose faith you lose all.
18
No amount of money ever bought a second of time.
Iron Man in The Avengers - Endgame
9
Veronica: "What's that smell? It's either vomit or fancy cheese."
Carl: "It can be both if you want."
Carl Gallagher in Shameless - Season 1 Episode 5
Fiona: "Wasn't he drunk when he proposed?"
Veronica: "Yeah, it was like David Hasselhoff video, eating a cheeseburger. YouTube it, it's a car wreck."
Veronica Fisher in Shameless - Season 1 Episode 5

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