The best Quotes by Gabrielle Solis

Desperate Housewives - Season 6 Episode 4

Sister Mary: "Money can't buy happiness."
Gabrielle: "Well, sure it can. That's just a lie we tell poor people to keep 'em from rioting."

Desperate Housewives

Do you know how bored I was today? I came this close to actually cleaning the house!

Desperate Housewives - Season 1 Episode 1

Cleaning

Bree: "Well, the key is to not let them know what you're doing. This requires observation, cunning and manipulation."
Gabrielle: "Isn't it just easier to shut down your hoo-ha until he gives in?"

Desperate Housewives - Season 5 Episode 23

It's like my grandmother always said: An erect penis doesn't have a conscience.

Desperate Housewives - Season 1 Episode 1

Sex Penisses

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The opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference. And if you hate me, that means you still care.

Bree Van De Kamp in Desperate Housewives - Season 2 Episode 16

Love Hatred Indifference

You should never trust a woman who just had her heart broken. We tend to lie.

Bree Van De Kamp in Desperate Housewives - Season 1 Episode 12

Women Breakup

Human beings are designed for many things, but loneliness isn't one of them.

Mary Alice Young in Desperate Housewives - Season 1 Episode 19

Solitude & Loneliness

We all havee momeents of deespeeration. If we can face them head-on, that's when we find out, how strong we really are.

Mary Alice Young in Desperate Housewives - Season 1 Episode 1

I want him to have what he wants - if it's what I want.

Lynette Scavo in Desperate Housewives - Season 3 Episode 6

Tom's packin'! We're talkin' big, circus big. So big, he can drive in the car pool lane when he's alone. If it falls in the forest, believe me - it makes a sound. The Washington monument looks at it and says, "I want to be you when I grow up!"

Lynette Scavo in Desperate Housewives - Season 7 Episode 9

Penisses

There's no bad guys here, there's just people trying to figure things out.

Lynette Scavo in Desperate Housewives - Season 8 Episode 7

Rich and single, I wonder what he looks like - you rarely get the trifecta.

Lynette Scavo in Desperate Housewives - Season 8 Episode 1

Singles & Dating

Baby. Number. Five. An entire basketball team has come out of me, so I'm officially too exhausted to care!

Lynette Scavo in Desperate Housewives - Season 7 Episode 1

Tom: "I never thought you'd want a fifth kid?"
Lynette: "I don't, but I didn't want the first four and they're starting to grow on me!"

Lynette Scavo in Desperate Housewives - Season 3 Episode 7

We've had sex 23 days straight. I've seen more ceiling than Michelangelo!

Lynette Scavo in Desperate Housewives - Season 5 Episode 21

Michelangelo Sex Erotic Quotes

Tom: "Are you as tired as I am?"
Lynette: "More. But I'm tougher, and I complain less."
Tom: "Not when you give birth - and you do that a lot."

Tom Scavo in Desperate Housewives - Season 3 Episode 16

Parker, I'm your mother. Mothers don't lie to their sons. Now go wash your hands or santa's not gonna bring you anything for christmas.

Lynette Scavo in Desperate Housewives - Season 2 Episode 19

Mother Santa Claus Mother & Son

We will find someone - someone who doesn't remember what they were doing the day Lincoln was shot.

Lynette Scavo in Desperate Housewives - Season 2 Episode 15

Lynette: "You think doing laundry is throwing dirty clothes in the hamper and getting clean ones out of the drawer."
Porter: "That's how dad does it?!"
Tom: "O-okay, let's stay on topic!"

Tom Scavo in Desperate Housewives - Season 7 Episode 15

Gabrielle: "She's Romanian! When your people are being chased into Argentina by angry cossacks, maybe a sparkling toilet isn't that important."
Carlos: "How about you stick to fractions, and I'll teach Juanita geography?"

Carlos Solis in Desperate Housewives - Season 6 Episode 7

Romania

To be with the same person for the rest of your life just sounds so drab.

Eva Longoria

My acting is still being recognized for the fact that I wasn't nominated.

Eva Longoria

You can't have a relationship when you're shooting a 14-hour day and your husband is shooting a 14-hour day in the same city. It's a time thing and it's a together thing.

Eva Longoria

I find it a turnoff whenever men aren't into some kind of sport. And, no, video games don't count. I dated a guy who was into video games, and I wanted to shoot myself.

Eva Longoria

I think what destroys Hollywood marriages is our work schedule, not so much infidelity.

Eva Longoria

You know the funny thing is, on the outside I was an honest man, straight as an arrow. I had to come to prison to be a crook.

Andy Dufresne in The Shawshank Redemption

Prisons

I hate cleaning up around here. What's the point? It's just gonna get dirty again.

Buttercup in The Powerpuff Girls

Cleaning

If you want more sex, just ask for it.

Damon Salvatore in The Vampire Diaries

Sex Erotic Quotes

Dude, I don't want to talk about Lacey's prom shoes. And I'll tell you why: I have this thing that makes me really uninterested in prom shoes. It's called a penis.

John Green in Paper Towns

Shoes Penisses

That pine shields my view of the Purcell's backyard, and if you had ever seen Mr. Purcell sunbathe, you'd know exactly what that tree means to me.

Bree Van De Kamp in Desperate Housewives - Season 4 Episode 1

Mike: "You're kidding. We're playing an actual gig?"
Tom: "In front of people who aren't listening just because I pay their allowance? Well, this is fantastic!"

Tom Scavo in Desperate Housewives - Season 5 Episode 7

Julie: "No man has seen you naked in years. Except your doctor."
Susan: "And he retired. I try not to take that personally."

Susan Mayer in Desperate Housewives - Season 1 Episode 8

Singles & Dating

Gabrielle: "How about that? And here I was thinking some guy wants to murder me in my sleep."
Carlos: "The night's still young!"

Carlos Solis in Desperate Housewives - Season 3 Episode 12

Andrew: "Mom...?"
Bree: "Please don't interrupt me while I'm speaking! Now what is it, dear?"
Andrew: "Danielle's upstairs trying to commit suicide. There's no rush, she's not trying that hard..."

Andrew Van de Kamp in Desperate Housewives - Season 3 Episode 5

Bree: "The man's a doctor, for heaven sakes. You've done better than I did."
Orson: "That was a bit of a drive-by."

Orson Hodge in Desperate Housewives - Season 5 Episode 10

If you start deporting every shady looking guy with questionable tattoos, who's gonna go to Jets games?

Jordan Klepper in The Daily Show

New York Jets

The best Quotes by Gabrielle Solis

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