Quotes by Fred and George Weasley

'E' for 'Exceeds Expectations'. And I've always thought Fred and I should've got 'E' in everything, because we exceeded expectations just by turning up for the exams.

If we're not careful, we'll have another Head Boy in the family. I don't think I could stand the shame.

"You haven't got a letter on yours," George observed, "I suppose she thinks you don't forget your name. But we're not stupid - we know we're called Gred and Forge."

"You're a prefect? Oh Ronnie! That's everyone in the family!"
"What are Fred and I? Next door neighbors?"

Where's the fun without a bit of risk?

Don't get lulled into a false sense of security, thinking he's out of the country. Maybe he is, maybe he isn't, but the fact remains he can move faster than Severus Snape confronted with shampoo.

"Now, you two – this year, you behave yourselves. If I get one more owl telling me you've – you've blown up a toilet or –"
"Blown up a toilet? We've never blown up a toilet."
"Great idea though, thanks, Mum."

"You won't tease him, will you?" she added anxiously.
"Wouldn't dream of it," said Fred, who was looking as if his birthday had come early.
"Definitely not," said George, sniggering.

"Would you like us to clean out your ears for you?" inquired George, pulling a long and lethal-looking metal instrument from inside one of the Zonko's bags.
"Or any part of your body, really, we're not fussy where we stick this," said Fred.

"Percy's been acting very oddly this summer," said George, frowning. "And he has been sending a lot of letters and spending a load of time shut up in his room... I mean, there's only so many times you can polish a prefect badge."

Well, none of us really fancy it, mate. Imagine if something went wrong, and we ended up a scrawny specky git forever.

Moody: "For those of you who haven't taken Polyjuice Potion before, fair warning: It tastes like goblin piss."
Fred: "Have a lot of experience with that, do you, Mad-Eye?"

"Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs," sighed George, patting the heading of the map. "We owe them so much."
"Noble men, working tirelessly to help a new generation of lawbreakers," said Fred solemnly.

"You don't want to bottle up your anger like that, Harry, let it all out," said Fred, also beaming. "There might be a couple of people fifty miles away who didn't hear you."

"George," said Fred, "I think we've outgrown full-time education."
"Yeah, I've been feeling that way myself," said George lightly.

Time is Galleons, little brother.

Ask us no questions and we'll tell you no lies.

"Don't, Ginny, we'll send you loads of owls."
"We'll send you a Hogwarts toilet seat."
"George!"
"Only joking, Mum."

"Size is no guarantee of power," said George. "Look at Ginny."

"Fred, you next," the plump woman said.
"I'm not Fred, I'm George," said the boy. "Honestly, woman, you call yourself our mother? Can't you tell I'm George?"
"Sorry, George, dear."
"Only joking, I am Fred," said the boy and off he went.

Fred and George turned to each other and said together, "Wow, we're identical!"
"I dunno though, I think I'm still better looking," said Fred, examining his reflection in the kettle.

"Well, that's that plan scuppered," said George, "Obviously there's no chance at all of us getting a bit of your hair unless you cooperate."
"Yeah, thirteen of us against one bloke who's not allowed to use magic; we've got no chance," said Fred.

Give her hell from us, Peeves.

"Where is Wood?" said Harry, suddenly realizing he wasn't there. "Still in the showers," said Fred. "We think he's trying to drown himself."

I thought it sounded a bit like Percy singing... maybe you've got to attack him while he's in the shower, Harry.

"Can't stay long, Mother," he said. "I'm up front, the prefects have got two compartments to themselves."
"Oh, are you a prefect, Percy?" said one of the twins, with an air of great surprise. "You should have said something, we had no idea."
"Hang on, I think I remember him saying something about it," said the other twin. "Once-"
"Or twice-"
"A minute-"
"All summer."

Fred's eyes stared without seeing, the ghost of his last laugh still etched upon his face.

Make way for the heir of Slytherin, seriously evil wizard coming through!

"Anyone can speak Troll," said Fred dismissively, "all you have to do is point and grunt."

"What do we want to be Prefects for?" said George, looking revolted at the very idea. "It’d take all the fun out of life."