Quote by Frank Gallagher (Season 3 Episode 12)

Frank: "What did they get you for again?"
"Beat my ex-wife to death with a telephone."
Frank': "Cordless or landline?"

Frank Gallagher in Shameless - Season 3 Episode 12

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Kate: "Fishing? Gonna use your tiny dick as a worm?"
Frank: "I've caught some big whales with this little worm. Yourself included there, Moby."

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You get along a lot better with a weapon and a kind word than a kind word alone.

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Weapons

That's the Gallagher sperm. Ambitious, relentless. Everything we're not once we're born. Like heat-seeking, baby-making missiles. Won't be long before the country's nothing but Mexicans and Gallaghers.

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Every day you wake up breathing, you should be coloring me a note of gratitude that the half of you that came from me wasn't spooged on your mother's neck, but instead was guided by yours truly to get up inside of her to start the life of you.

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Carl Gallagher

I am fed up with these pan-gender hermaphrodites who hate that human beings are a species with two distinct genders. It's like they've declared war on testicles. They wanna remove all the masculinity from the schools, fill the world with yogurt-eaters.

Frank Gallagher in Shameless - Season 1 Episode 6

We all have our phobias and school is mine. All of it. Textbooks full of falsehoods, teachers unions full of thugs, and tenured imbeciles who still use words like "irregardless".

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Why are all the news ladies Chinese? They should stick to what they know: railroads, sushi and dim sum.

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China

This is not a dictatorship. This is America. Give me liberty, or give me meth.

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USA

If God didn't want us putting things up our ass, he would have given the rectum a gag reflex.

Frank Gallagher in Shameless - Season 3 Episode 4

Ass

Bullying is a vital part of every ecosystem. It teaches kids resilience. The world is a rough place. Bullying is like getting inoculated. It's a vaccine.

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Bullying

Doing things you don't want to do is how you make a relationship work.

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Relationships

Love is not supposed to be cute. Love is supposed to be raw and destructive.

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Love

We may not have much, but all of us, to a man, knows the most important thing in this life: We know how to f*cking party!

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Parties

I love you. It means we take care of each other. It means thick and thin, good times, bad, sickness, health, all that shit.

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Love declerations

You can’t drink him away. It won’t work.

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Alcohol Breakup

I believe the answer to that question, like the answer to most questions, is f*ck you!

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Debs, we need at least one person in this family to not turn cynical, and my money's been on you.

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Debbie Gallagher

I don't go onto Facebook because I don't give a shit about whose pet just died or who just checked in at the f*cking McDonald's.

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Facebook

Seriosly, I don't mean to be an asshole, it's just... genetic.

Fiona Gallagher in Shameless - Season 3 Episode 6

I kind of have no choice. I gotta find Frank. Get him sober and ready to appear in court. He's like my sad-ass Obi-Wan Kenobi.

Fiona Gallagher in Shameless - Season 3 Episode 6

Obi-Wan Kenobi

Jenna dances for an audience. You dance like there's no one else in the room. You life's not simple, Fiona, and you can't stop it from showing because you're no fake. You're not lost. You don't need finding. This whole city belongs to the Jennas, I'm sick of them. I swear, Fiona, you're nothing like anyone I've ever met. You make me want to enjoy my life again.

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Fiona Gallagher Love declerations

I'm sorry, but no one speaking English as a first language should be doing this job.

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What can I say, once you go white, you always stay tight. Hey, I think I just insulted myself.

Kevin Ball in Shameless - Season 3 Episode 12

Too many Gallaghers in the world already. Instead of passing rubbers out at your school, they should be passing them out at your house.

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I have red hair, freckles and crooked teeth. I don't need any more character!

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Ginger / Redhairs

Sheila: "Now, by sifting we separate and aerate those flour particles to make them absorb liquids better."
Deb: "Someone should sift my dad."

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Teenagers. They're hormon-soaked brains aren't wired to think about anyone other than themselves.

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Teenagers

Clare: "Thank you. God loves you."
Veronica: "Yeah, if that were true, he'd have made me white and rich."

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You're like a f*cking cockroach, able to live anywhere and feed off anything.

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Phillip Gallagher

Sometimes we get so wrapped up in getting what we want, that we forget to ask ourselves why we wanted it in the first place.

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Ambition

Sometimes when people love each other very much, they need time apart, so when they come back together, their love is even stronger.

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Sometimes when people love each other very much, they need time apart, so when they come back together, their love is even stronger.

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Love

Every time we open our hearts, every time we open our gates, we take a risk.

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Every time we open our hearts, every time we open our gates, we take a risk.

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You can't lose your virginity to a tampon. It has to be a penis with a man attached.

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Penisses

The good parts of love are so good, you're willing to suffer an unbelievable amount of pain just to get to them. That's why I have been married three times and engaged 12.

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Lanier: "Your body is a temple, Carl, and you only want to put things in it that are natural."
Carl: "Like fists? I saw it in that movie."

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Veronica: "What's that smell? It's either vomit or fancy cheese."
Carl: "It can be both if you want."

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Quote by Frank Gallagher (Season 3 Episode 12)

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