Quotes by Fran Lebowitz

I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not.

Romantic love is mental illness. But it's a pleasurable one. It's a drug. It distorts reality, and that's the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw.

Do not, on a rainy day, ask your child what he feels like doing, because I assure you that what he feels like doing, you won't feel like watching.

The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer them a drink.

In the Soviet Union, capitalism triumphed over communism. In this country, capitalism triumphed over democracy.