Quote by Ernie & Bert (Season 1 Episode 2)

Bert: "Ernie... did I make a complete fool of myself?"
Ernie: "Absolutely, Bert."

Ernie & Bert in The Muppet Show - Season 1 Episode 2

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Statler: "Mit den Jahren gefällt mir die Show immer besser."
Waldorf: "Weil die Witze immer besser werden?"
Statler: "Nein, weil mein Gehör immer schlechter wird!"

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Statler: "Do you think this show is educational?"
Waldorf: "Yes. It'll drive people to read books."

Waldorf & Statler in The Muppet Show - Season 1 Episode 2

Waldorf: "Statler isn't here tonight, Kermit. He's sick."
Kermit: "Oh, that's too bad. The flu?"
Waldorf: "No, the show. He's sick of it."

Waldorf & Statler in The Muppet Show - Season 4 Episode 13

Waldorf: "Just when you think the show is terrible, something wonderful happens."
Statler: "What?"
Waldorf: "It ends."

Waldorf & Statler in The Muppet Show - Season 4 Episode 3

Statler: "I know what is wrong, with this show, it's the theater."
Waldorf: "What's wrong with it?"
Statler: "The seats face the stage."

Waldorf & Statler in The Muppet Show - Season 2 Episode 1

Waldorf: "How should we know how to get to Sesame Street?"
Statler: "We don't even know how to get out of this stupid theater box!"

Waldorf & Statler in The Muppet Show - Season 5 Episode 18

Waldorf: "Well, this has been an evening to remember."
Statler: "Why?"
Waldorf: "I forgot."

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Waldorf: "Do you think there's life in outer space?"
Statler: "There's certainly none in this theater."

Waldorf & Statler in The Muppet Show - Season 4 Episode 17

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Nurse Piggy: "It's too late, Dr. Bob. We've lost him."
Doctor Bob: "Well, he couldn't have gone so far. He was under the sheet just a second ago."

Doctor Bob in The Muppet Show - Season 1 Episode 17