The best Quotes by Eddie Murphy

The best Quotes by Eddie Murphy

Edward Regan Murphy (born April 3, 1961) is an American actor and comedian. He rose to fame on the sketch comedy show Saturday Night Live, for which he was a regular cast member from 1980 to 1984. Murphy has also worked as a stand-up comedian and is ranked No. 10 on Comedy Central's list of the 100 Greatest Stand-ups of All Time.

I want to let you know that there is a definitive blueprint that you can follow to achieve success, prosperity, longevity and peace of mind. I've followed it my whole career. It's very simple, just do these three things: pay your taxes, mind your business and keep Will Smith's wife's name out of your f*cking mouth!
January 2023
I can figure out which Spice Girl I wanna impregnate.
White boys always get the Oscar. It's a known fact. Did I ever get a nomination? No! You know why? Cause I hadn't played any of them slave roles, and get my ass whipped. That's how you get the nomination as a black dude.
Anything you have to "acquire a taste for" was not meant to be eaten.
The advice I would give to someone is to not take anyone's advice.
If I don't die in a plane crash or something, this country has a rare opportunity to watch a great talent grow.
The thing about kids is that they express emotion. They don't hold back. If they want to cry, they cry, and if they are in a good mood, they're in a good mood.
I'm a comedian who got into movies, so I don't really think of myself as an actor.
In the original script, my character was a basketball player rather than a boxer. I didn't think I could pull that off. I'm a little short to be a basketball player!

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Fiona: "It talks?"
Shrek: "Yeah, but it's getting him to shut up that's the trick."
Donkey: "So where is this fire-breathin' pain in the neck, anyway?"
Shrek: "In the tower, waiting for us to rescue her."
Donkey: "I was talkin' about the dragon, Shrek."
Donkey in Shrek
Shrek: "Ogres are like onions."
Donkey: "They stink?"
Shrek: "No. Layers. Onions have layers. Ogres have layers."
You're not that ugly. All right, you are ugly. But you're only like this at night. Shrek's ugly 24/7.
Donkey in Shrek
Some of you may die, but it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make.
Lord Farquaad in Shrek
"I like an honest fight and a saucy little maid…"
"What he's basically saying is he likes to get…"
I hope you heard that. She called me a noble steed. She thinks I'm a steed.
Donkey in Shrek
Shrek: "If I treat you so badly, then why are you still here?"
Donkey: "Because that's what friends do, they forgive each other."
Donkey in Shrek
No journey is too great when one finds what he seeks.
Prince Akeem in Coming to America
So you see, my son, there is a very fine line between love and nausea.
Jaffe Joffer in Coming to America
I want a woman so black when you make love you need a flashlight.
It is also tradition that times must and always do change, my friend.
Prince Akeem in Coming to America
I want a woman that will arouse my intellect as well as my loins.
Prince Akeem in Coming to America
Time does fly fast, my son. It seems only yesterday I ordered your first diaper changed. Now you're a man about to be married. She will give you much pleasure, don't you think?
Jaffe Joffer in Coming to America
Is it just me, or does every woman in Queens have some kind of an emotional problem?
Prince Akeem in Coming to America
I never been in no cell that had a phone in it. Can I stay for a while? 'Cause I ordered some pizza.
Axel Foley in Beverly Hills Cop
This is the cleanest and nicest police car I've ever been in in my life. This thing's nicer than my apartment.
Axel Foley in Beverly Hills Cop
Jenny: "I remember you used to drive that crappy blue Chevy Nova."
[both chuckle]
Jenny: "What are you driving now?"
Axel: "Same crappy blue Chevy Nova."
Axel Foley in Beverly Hills Cop
Todd is looking for you. He is really pissed. You know what he said? He said this is your worst f*ck up ever. Personally, I don't think that's true.
Jeffrey Friedman in Beverly Hills Cop
Michael Jackson can sit on top of the world, just as long as he doesn't sit in the Beverly Palm Hotel, 'cause there's no n*ggars allowed in there!
Axel Foley in Beverly Hills Cop
Yo, man, we gotta talk, seriously. Who do you think you are, Clint Eastwood? Dirty Rosewood?
Axel Foley in Beverly Hills Cop
I got thrown out of a window! What's the f*cking charge for getting pushed out of a moving car, huh? Jaywalking?
Axel Foley in Beverly Hills Cop
Akbar: "This kufi that I'm wearing was actually a gift from the honorable Louis Farrakhan. Are you familiar with the minister's work?"
Ezra's Mom: "Well, I'm familiar with what he said about the Jews..."
Ezra: "Let's have dinner!"
Ezra Cohen in You People
Ever figure out what happened with the potatoes? An ETA on those?
Ezra Cohen in You People
Akbar: "So, you wanna marry my daughter?"
Ezra: "Yes. Yes, I do."
Akbar: "Well, Ezra, you can try."
Akbar Mohammed in You People
Amira: "Get out! Help, I'm being attacked!"
Ezra: "Okay! But you're not getting five stars."
Amira: "I'm not no Uber driver!"
Amira Mohammed in You People
I've never heard of a man who wanted a relationship so badly besides Drake. And I'm talking Views Drake.
Sam Jay in You People
"What are you up to these days? Got a girlfriend?"
Ezra: "No."
"You don't like getting p*ssy?"
Ezra: "Well, hearing the word 'p*ssy' come out of your mouth does make me question whether or not I like it."
Ezra Cohen in You People
There is no reason to have a plan B, because it distracts from plan A.
Love will make you do crazy things.
Will Smith - März 2022, Oscar accepting speech
He who says he can and he who says he can't, are both usually right.
I don't care if you're black, white, straight, bisexual, gay, lesbian, short, tall, fat, skinny, rich or poor. If you're nice to me, I'll be nice to you. Simple as that.
Sometimes you just gotta let shit go and say 'to hell with it' and move on.
You've got enemies? Good. That means you actually stood up for something.
If you wanna be my lover
You gotta get with my friends
Make it last forever, friendship never ends
If you wanna be my lover
You have got to give
Taking is too easy, but that's the way it is
Spice Girls - Wannabe, Album: Spice
If you want my future
Forget my past
If you wanna get with me
Better make it fast
Now, don't go wasting
My precious time
Get your act together, we could be just fine
Spice Girls - Wannabe, Album: Spice
Stop right now, thank you very much
I need somebody with a human touch
Hey you, always on the run
Gotta slow it down baby, gotta have some fun
Spice Girls - Stop, Album: Spiceworld
Well, the way things are going, aside from wheat and auto parts, America's biggest export is now the Oscar.
I can't believe I am hosting the Oscars. It's an honor everyone else said no.
Don't listen to the advice of people who are living lives you don't want to live.

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